crouched at his feet. “You hit your noggin pretty hard, Geo. I’m worried you might have a concussion.”
Gut still churning, Geo submitted to a quick exam, his head drooping as the medic gave Matt instructions on what to look for during what remained of the night. “Keep a close eye on him, and call me if he vomits again.”
“Roger that.”
After the medic had gotten up, Alex took his place. “You know Parnell’s gonna call for a Trident review board,” he said without preamble.
“I know.” Geo pinched the bridge of his nose and swallowed hard. “What are the chances he’ll get my bird pulled?”
After all, he’d swung first. He’d let his anger get the best of him, and now Lennox could end his career. With Geo’s Trident yanked from him, he’d be sent out into the fleet, his life as a SEAL over.
Oh, my God. What have I done?
“We’ll figure something out,” Alex said softly. “I’m gonna sleep on it, so let’s meet with the El-Tee in the morning, okay?”
At Geo’s miserable nod, Alex squeezed his knee and stood. Matt turned to Geo. “C’mon, bud. Let’s get you home.”
Home? Geo’s eyes stung. Yeah, right. Another transient barracks in yet another city—white walls, industrial-grade linoleum, bleach-scented sheets, lumpy pillows. Some home.
They were silent as they trudged down the sidewalk, Matt not touching him but sticking close in case he stumbled. Once in the room, he sat on the closed toilet lid while Geo showered.
“I’m fine, Matt,” he croaked at one point. “Really.”
Matt shook his head stubbornly. “Swim buddies,” was all he said.
“You gonna crawl in bed with me, too?” Geo kept up the grousing as he pulled on some boxer briefs and yanked back the covers. He curled up on his side, his back to Matt.
Matt didn’t say anything, just filled a glass with water and put it on the nightstand, his hand coming to rest briefly on Geo’s shoulder. The comforting touch brought more tears rushing to his eyes. He choked them back, his head throbbing, and listened to the quiet rustle as Matt undressed and slipped into his own bed.
“I’m here if you need me,” Matt said quietly, then switched off the lamp, plunging the room into darkness, except for the soft glow of his phone. He wouldn’t sleep, Geo knew—he’d stay awake in order to check on him periodically, a swim buddy to the core.
“I’m sorry,” he mouthed into his pillow. I’m sorry, Matt. I’m sorry, Cade. Oh, God, I’m so fucking sorry.
To his horror, an audible sob broke from his chest. He stiffened, but Matt didn’t rush to his side or demand to know what was wrong.
“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked, and when Geo croaked a “No,” he murmured, “Okay. I’m here if you do.”
“Thanks, bud,” Geo managed, burying his face in his pillow. How could he ever talk about the night Cade died, what he’d seen? What he’d done?
Or not done.
Suppressing another sob, Geo twisted his fists in the pillow, trying not to gasp under the weight of the grief and remorse crushing him. He’d had a chance. For one brief moment in time, he’d had a chance to stop the course of events that’d led to Cade eating that bullet.
But he hadn’t.
And living with that was proving to be the hardest thing he’d ever done.
Chapter Thirteen
“We’ve given this a lot of thought, George.”
Still weak and shaky, his head pounding like a bitch, Geo stood at attention in front of Alex and the officer-in-charge, a newly minted lieutenant not long out of the Naval Academy. Like all Academy grads, the lieutenant carried himself with the sort of polish that made Geo think of a politician.
A lot of the enlisted guys distrusted him for that, but Geo saw a thoughtful, deliberate man underneath the Academy veneer. In his opinion, the dude would make an outstanding leader someday, so Geo’d done his best to ease the lieutenant’s transition into the platoon.
Would that act of support and loyalty pay off now? He couldn’t tell by the expression in the lieutenant’s eyes, which rested on Geo’s face with their now-familiar coolness. “Ensign Parnell is already pushing for a Trident review board,” he said quietly. “This incident—striking an officer—along with your arrest of a few weeks ago, makes me think it’s warranted.”
Geo kept quiet.
“Your drinking has increased exponentially. Several of your teammates have remarked on it,” the lieutenant went on. He paused. “A few have raised concerns about operating with you.”
The words hit Geo like a hammer blow,