Or at least, he had at first.
Now? I wasn’t afraid. He’d pushed me out of my comfort zone in so many ways. He hadn’t set out to show me I was brave, but he had. Because that was the thing, when I was with him, I did feel brave. It was like he sucked all the fear out of the room and made it disappear.
I missed him so much.
For the millionth time, I thought about texting him. Or even calling. Why was I hesitating? Because I didn’t know what I wanted to say?
Or was it because I did know what I wanted to say?
I was so confused.
Confused or not, I decided to celebrate my little victory with some coffee at the Steaming Mug, so I saved and backed up my manuscript—again, just to be safe. I brushed out my hair, dabbed on a little makeup, and changed into a burgundy sweater and jeans. I slipped my feet into a cute pair of leopard print flats—because why not—and went downstairs.
Dad was on duty today, and Mom was out. A sense of peace had settled over the house since Dad had asked her to stay. I glanced around at the furniture—at Mom’s things from her old house that had somehow fit perfectly in the empty spaces here.
It was very poetic. They filled the empty places in each other’s lives.
They’d decided to see a couple’s therapist to help them navigate this new phase in their relationship. There were still old wounds from the past that needed healing. And for two people who’d been single for twenty years, learning to share their lives again was going to take some work. But I’d never seen either of them as happy as they were now.
I slipped on my coat, grabbed my purse, and opened the front door. I jumped backward with a shriek, startling at the sight of the man on the step.
Cullen’s hand slowly lowered—it looked like he’d been about to knock. “Sorry, Skylar. It’s just me.”
I gaped at him. “What are you doing here?”
“I need to talk to you.”
“Why? Because your life imploded on national television?”
He blinked in surprise. “You saw that?”
“Yeah, I saw it.” I decided not to mention that my friend Cara had somehow tipped off the interviewer about his affair with Pepper.
“Okay, well, can I come in?”
I crossed my arms. “No.”
“Really? Come on, Skylar, I just want to talk.”
“I can’t even fathom what you think you have to say to me.”
He took a deep breath, as if coming to terms with the fact that I wasn’t going to invite him in. “Have you been writing?”
My lips twitched in a smile. I didn’t have to tell him this—or anything—but I was feeling pretty great about it, so why not? “Not that it’s any of your business, but yes. I finished my next novel.”
“That’s great. Have you found someone to represent you?”
“Why, are you here to try to win me back?”
“Yes.”
I stared at him in disbelief. He could not be serious. “Wait, what? I thought you got fired.”
“I did, but I’ll find another agency.”
“Especially if you bring a client with you,” I said wryly.
“No, that’s not why I’m here. It’s not about my job. I care about your career because I care about you. I want you back, Skylar.”
I laughed, because honestly, what else could I do? “It’s too late for that, Cullen. Way too late. If you cared about me, you shouldn’t have cheated on me.”
“I know I made a huge mistake. I regret it all, Skylar. I’m so sorry.”
I hesitated, my eyes flicking up and down. He looked awful. His clothes were disheveled, his normally well-groomed hair needed a trim, and his skin was pale.
Cara karma indeed.
“Thank you for saying sorry. I forgive you.”
His eyes lit up, but I raised a hand before he could reply.
“I’m not finished,” I said. “I’m not forgiving you for you, I’m forgiving you for me. What you did to me was awful. It was a total deal breaker. Even if you were the only hope I had of resurrecting my career, I still wouldn’t sign with you again. And as for anything else, you burned that bridge. Thoroughly.”
“Skylar, please.”
I shook my head. “I told you that one day you were going to realize what you lost. I’m sure that feeling sucks, but you have to live with what you did.”
He opened his mouth to say something, but I was finished with this conversation. I stepped out, then shut and locked the door.
“I was just leaving.