him to care about me.
I gave him half a smile anyway for his attempt at humor and then turned away from him so that I could stare down the long hallway. Light from the arched windows skittered across the floor, breaking up the dull florescent lighting that buzzed with the effort to stay on.
“It’s just that… this locker really pisses me off,” I finally admitted.
Ryder choked on surprised laughter and I turned back to face him. His expression had relaxed into amusement and I could finally suck in a much needed breath. “You two should probably get couples’ counseling then, since you have to put up with each other for the rest of the year and all.” He bent over to retrieve my pen before he crossed the hallway in three strides so that we were just inches away from each other. He remained calm and cool, my presence doing none of its usual tricks. So I was even more irritated by how unfair it was that I was struggling to remain indifferent. He was just fine, completely freaking fine. He was like this presence that penetrated every last bit of my consciousness, even his shadow weighed heavily on me, pressing me back into the bank of metal lockers. And his smell, maybe his cologne that clung to his clothes and floated in the air between us was surprisingly delicious and maybe a bit peculiar… like coconut and cookies. It infiltrated every one of my senses until I could barely suppress the need to lean into him and nuzzle against his neck. His smell threw me off. Way off.
“You smell like a girl,” I blurted out a little bit too loud.
Ryder paused, giving me a look of complete confusion, before his lips slowly turned up into an amused grin. “Shut it, Pierce. It’s my shampoo.”
An unexpected giggle burst from my throat and I smacked my hand over my mouth to stop any more foreign sounds from escaping. “Your shampoo?”
“It’s coconut oil,” he admitted, dipping his head as if embarrassed.
“Why?” I asked simply, shaking my head at him.
“Don’t ask questions you’re not prepared to hear the answers to,” Ryder growled ominously, but I could tell he was being sarcastic.
“What does that even mean?” I shook my head at him, laughter bubbling up inside me again.
“I don’t really know,” he laughed too, mimicking the side to side motion of my head. “But I was trying to sound manly again. You know, most girls like it. I usually get complimented.” He finally defended himself with an air of self-importance, crossing his arms across his chest and pulling his t-shirt tight across his pronounced muscles.
My eyes dropped from his silver pools of eyes to his chest for just two and a half seconds before I popped my gaze up hoping he hadn’t noticed. The narrowed slits of his eyes told me there was no chance in hell I got away with checking him out. Shoot.
“I’m not most girls,” I grumbled. I bent over to pick up my books that were strewn in a messy pile at my feet and Ryder held out my pen to me, waiting for me to stand up again.
I heard him mumble, “That is the truth,” under his breath and I whipped up into standing to launch a full-fledged attack on him when I found him grinning at me, completely disarming my intentions. “It’s supposed to be healthy…. like good for me. I was told that it would reduce my uh…. issues with my hair. I’m starting to think the girl who cuts it might actually hate me though.”
It took me until the word “hair” to realize we were talking about his shampoo again and not my issues. When I finally caught up to the conversation I couldn’t stop myself from laughing again. Real laughter, the kind that expanded in my lungs and bubbled out of my mouth like a fountain. The expansion in my chest felt foreign and underused and my lungs ached with the effort, but in a good way…. a really good way.
“Your hair is kind of awful, actually,” I admitted lightly. My fingers were tangled through his coarse locks before I knew what I was doing. My hand slid through his thick, unruly hair, brushing it back from his forehead and testing the rough, bristly texture between my fingertips.
“What?” He gasped with faux defensiveness, his eyes going wide with pretend horror. “You’re not turned on by the sexy bed head look?” He leaned forward and shook