bedroom was the furthest from the kitchen and living area, so I gestured for him to follow me.
I didn't realize until we were in my bedroom with the door shut behind us, that he hadn't been back in here since the night of Cam's wedding. The subtle glance he shot the bed reminded me of everything that happened that night and how it felt, and the heat in my cheeks spread to the rest of my body.
"What's wrong?" I asked when it seemed all he was going to do was stare at my bed.
J.J.'s eyes shot to me and he lifted the envelope. "A prenup?" he asked.
I nodded. "Absolutely."
He tossed the envelope onto the bed. "I realize that we discussed dissolving our marriage once you no longer needed my help but why didn't you tell me you wanted a prenuptial agreement?"
"I honestly didn't think about it until a couple of days ago," I answered. "And I didn't ask you because I know you're a decent guy and you would say no because you didn't want me to feel like you only cared about the money. But I think it's important we have some sort of agreement in place for the future. It will keep things from getting...messy."
J.J. scrubbed his hands over his face and I noticed his outfit. He wore a pair of simple dark slacks and a crisp white button-down shirt. He looked handsome and he smelled delicious.
"Lee, I know we discussed this marriage being temporary, but you sound like you've already got one foot out the door."
"No, I'm planning for the future," I stated.
"What happens if one of us doesn't want a divorce?" he asked.
I blinked at him for a moment, trying to process his words. "You mean, me? Or you?"
"Either of us," he answered, waving a hand.
"Then, I suppose we would have to talk about it."
He stared at me, long and hard. "But would you talk to me about it if you were the one who didn't want a divorce?"
I blinked again. "What do you mean?"
He sighed and sat on the edge of my bed, his shoulders rounded as though in defeat. "Lee, I realize that you're worried that I might feel pressured in this situation, but I don't. If you think back, I'm the one who suggested marriage. I didn't bring up the option for divorce until you made it clear you didn't want to be trapped with me as a spouse. If anyone should feel pressured here, it's you."
I opened my mouth then shut it. I had no idea what to say.
"I have no idea how you really feel about this because you haven't talked to me about it yet. I don't want you to feel pressured and I don't want you to feel like you have to hide your feelings from me. When I proposed marriage, I meant a real marriage. But you made it clear that you're not ready for that and I understood. But now I feel like you're already marking down the days until you can file for divorce and I'm worried that you don't want to do this and you feel like you have to."
Whoa, that was...a lot.
I moved to sit next to him, shoving the brown envelope out of the way. I had to gather my courage because other than our first and only night together, I hadn't made the first move in any of our interactions. It had been him asking for more and accepting less.
I reached out and took his hand in mine. "I do want to marry you, J.J. I don't know if I'm ready for 'a real marriage' as you put it, but I want to have a chance to get to know you as a person before our baby comes. And I want you to be a part of the pregnancy because I can tell you really want to be. I also want you to be a part of the baby's life. It's important for the baby and for you and me, too." I swallowed hard. "I can't predict how either of us will feel in six months or a year because even though we've known each other for a long time, it's different when you're romantically involved and living together. For all you know, I could drive you nuts with my need for tidiness or my obsession with having lists and plans for almost every aspect of my life."
"Or I could be a complete slob who drinks beer in my underwear all weekend