grips my hand. “Danni, look at me.”
I lift my eyes and sink into the devastating depths of his.
“I’ve always been careful,” he says with earnest. “I’ve always used protection.”
“But you didn’t with me.”
He pries the ring from my hand and holds it in front of my face, catching the light from the nearby lamp.
Is something etched on the inside? An inscription?
I clasp his wrist and angle it closer, twisting it in his grip.
One Promise ~ One Forever
My chin quivers, and my voice abandons me.
“You’re my forever, Danni.” He returns the ring to my finger and caresses my cheek. “I didn’t need protection with you.”
I nod and inch closer, touching my lips to his. “Thank you.”
He holds me for several minutes before taking a breath that hitches his chest. “We need to talk about the wedding.”
“We have plenty of time—”
“We don’t.” He nudges me up, and the wrinkles around his eyes alarm me.
“What is it?”
“I have to leave town for a while.”
“What?” I slide off him and sit up. “When? For how long?”
He shifts, putting his back to the headboard and pulling the sheet across his waist. “It’s work. I have to take these trips sometimes. Out of the country.”
If it was a weekend or even a week-long trip, his expression wouldn’t be so grave.
My stomach sinks. “For how long, Cole?”
“A year.”
My heart stops. “No. Tell them you can’t do it.”
“Can’t do that, baby.” He bends forward, dropping his head and avoiding eye contact.
A dead giveaway. When he can’t look at me, it means the worst news is coming.
“Why?” It’s all I can ask. My entire body is in shock.
“I work for a government agency that deploys—”
“You’re a fucking auditor!”
“Let me finish.”
I sit back and cross my arms to hide my shaking. This shouldn’t upset me so much. We’ve only been together nine months, but dammit, I haven’t been separated from him for a single night since we met. I’ve never been this person, this dependent, needy creature who can’t live without a man. But now I am, and I hate myself for it.
“I’m sorry.” I roll back my shoulders and meet his eyes. “Go ahead.”
“I audit records for freedom of information, and I’ve been assigned to the al-Bashrah oil terminal in the southern waters off Iraq. I’m stepping in as a project manager to make sure the government isn’t getting screwed by the contractors.”
“You’re going to Iraq. For a year.” I let that sit for a second and measure my breathing. “When do you leave?”
“Next month.”
“Next month,” I echo hollowly.
“When do you want to get married?”
“I don’t know.” I can’t even think about that, but I know I have to. He’s leaving. “I kind of hate you right now,” I say without conviction.
“Hate me all you want.” He grips my chin and waits until I meet his eyes. “We’re getting married. We can do it now or a year from now, but it’s happening.”
I’m going to spend a year alone. I can do it as his fiancé or as his brand-new bride. Tears flood my eyes and spill down my cheeks, collecting in a salty pool at the corner of my mouth.
“Damn you, Cole.” I lift a hand to shove his touch away, but my fingers curl around his forearm instead, holding on with aching desperation. “A fucking year.”
He hauls me onto his lap, arranges my legs around his hips, and hugs me tight to his chest. “I can’t stomach the thought of being away from you.”
“I’ll go with—”
“No. It’s not even an option.”
My eyes widen. “Will you be in danger?”
He laughs—an empty sound I’ve never heard him make—and strokes a hand through my hair. “No.”
“Then why can’t I go?” Mother of God, am I whining?
“You have a dance company to run. Besides, civilians aren’t allowed near the offshore oil platforms. You can’t be there.”
The gravity of the situation sets in, and the lump in my throat burns red-hot.
No Cole smiles for a year. No riding on the back of his bike. No strip teases on the pole. No holding hands at Cardinals games. No sharing beers in the backyard.
“No sex for a year.” I trail my fingers across his bottom lip.
“I’ll be jerking off to memories of you dancing naked.”
I smile sadly. “You’ll come back to me?”
“Yes.” He lifts my hand and touches his lips to my ring, his eyes bright and unyielding. “I promise.”
One promise.
One forever.
“I’ll wait for you.” I fold my arms around his neck and touch my mouth to his ear. “I’d wait for you forever.”
Chapter