head is so fucked over you.” He focuses his gaze out the window again and lowers his voice. “Over the fact that you’re with Brian. That you chose Brian.”
My heart races. “Would it be different if my relationship was with someone else? If that man wasn’t your brother?”
He lifts a shoulder, and then he looks over at me and shakes his head sadly. “No. The end result is the same. It’s not me.”
Our eyes meet for a searing moment. His eyes blaze into mine. He wants me, wants this—right here in the back of his car, and I want it, too. I want to be sitting like we were as we traveled down the Strip, like we were today before I pushed him away. I want him close. I want to smell him, to radiate in his warmth, to feel him in my orbit.
But there’s a line between us—a clear, forbidden divider that would be immoral to cross, no matter how right it feels.
Now I’m the one looking out the window. It’s hard to concentrate with his green eyes pinning me to my seat. I think back to Jill’s words—when he looks at you with those green eyes, you do anything he asks.
I’m just not sure what he’s asking, and I’m not sure whether to go with my gut and believe that he’s being sincere or go with what my boyfriend told me about him.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
We stay on our separate sides of the car for the rest of the ride back to Vegas, but things have definitely changed. If nothing else, I feel a little closer to him. The ride was full of ups and downs—we went from laughing together over Snapchat to me yelling at him for showing up at my parents’ house. It’s like a reflection of what a life together might be like, a rollercoaster halfway between terrifying and thrilling.
Except I’ll never know what a life together would be like. That thought hurts my heart more than I care to admit.
The closer we get to Vegas, the wider the wedge between us grows. We both grow quiet, lost in our thoughts. It’s the elephant in the room, the name we keep pretending doesn’t exist. But it does exist, and he’ll be waiting for me back at Mark’s place.
The Strip lies ahead of us, a beacon in the distance. I catch a glimpse of Mandalay Bay on the left and follow the line all the way to the Stratosphere on the right. It looks tiny from this distance, but I know we’ll be there in less than twenty minutes.
Mark presses a button. “Call up Vinny and tell him to pull into the gas station at the next exit.”
“Yes sir,” comes the voice from the driver’s seat.
I glance over at Mark.
“If you want to switch cars, this is the place to do it.” He stares straight ahead as he speaks, as if it’s painful for him to say the words.
“If I want to? Mark, it doesn’t matter if I want to. I have to.”
He finally turns toward me. “You think it doesn’t matter? Of course it matters.”
I break our eye contact and return my gaze out the window without another word. We get to the gas station, and I get out of the car, each step I take pushing me further from Mark and closer to Brian.
Even if Brian’s claims about his brother aren’t true, this is still the right decision. No matter how I look at it, Mark would be a risk. Brian’s a sure thing. I may live in Vegas, but my heart is too valuable a currency to gamble with.
I trudge toward my car. Vinny parked it in front of a pump, and he’s standing just outside the driver’s door. “Want me to fill it?” he asks as I approach.
“I’ve got it,” I say.
He nods once, and I walk over and slide in my credit card. I fill the tank, and just after I pull the receipt from the printer, my skin erupts in goosebumps and then I’m forced up against my car. I grunt, half in fear and half in pleasure. I know it’s Mark before I even make eye contact.
His body presses me to my car, his erection pushing into my hip. He leans down and nuzzles my neck, and my body vibrates. A soft purr escapes me when his lips press to my skin, and then he’s nipping his way up to my lips and I’m lost.
He opens his mouth to mine, and