blood to avenge my father without a thought for the consequences. If it wasn't for Kyan, I could be rotting in a prison cell right now. We all could be. And it was clear Nash saw that as a possible outcome for whatever way this went. But the idea of him throwing away his life, of him being ripped away from me too just made me hurt.
"Just be smart about it. Have an exit plan," I pushed.
He nodded firmly. "I will. Just as soon as I have an actual way to get to him."
“You’ve been careful up until now,” I agreed. “You’ve covered your tracks coming here, you changed your name, buried your own identity…I just can’t help but worry after everything Troy already did to your family. He’s clearly vindictive and ruthless enough to do whatever it takes to silence you and I just can’t bear the idea of something happening to you like that…”
I trailed off, biting my lip and Monroe gently caught my chin and turned my gaze up to meet his.
“Did I ever tell you what my name was, once upon a time?” he asked softly, a slight frown tugging at his brow.
I shook my head slowly, looking into his deep blue eyes and feeling all the hurt of that pain and grief which lived in him there. We were the same now, me and him, both orphans who had lost our siblings too. Both lost souls cut adrift with no one who remembered the children we once were or the love our families once felt.
“It was Jase,” he said as a little smile tugged at the corner of my lips. “Jase Harrington.”
“Jase,” I murmured and he released a soft groan, leaning forward to press his forehead to mine.
“A part of me loves the sound of that name on your lips,” he breathed. “But I’m not him anymore. I feel like he was this nice, honest, hard working kid and I’m little more than a shell holding his memories tightly like grains of sand in my fist, desperately trying to keep hold of them even while they continue to slip away. The things I’ve done…the things I plan to do and am willing to do in payment for the lives of my family, they don’t belong to him. He had everything to live for. And I just have this one thing.”
“Just the one?” I asked softly, trying to ignore the twist of pain in my gut at that statement.
“That was how it was for a hell of a long time, anyway,” he replied, pulling back and using his hold on my chin to get me to look up at him again. “But now I have you. Or at least, I hope I do. And I’m starting to think I’ve got a whole lot more to live for now.”
“You do have me,” I promised him and some of the darkness in his blue eyes lightened. “And I have you too.”
His lips found mine in a soft, sweet promise of that and some of the pain in my heart seemed to loosen its grip on me as I stole a moment in his strong arms. But we didn’t have any more time available to linger and I pushed him back gently with a light laugh.
“That said, we do still wanna take down Troy Memphis, so we should really be concentrating on finding some dirt on this laptop.”
Monroe smiled hungrily, releasing me as he turned his attention back to the hunt and I couldn’t help but smile to myself at the memory of his mouth on mine and the little piece of his soul he’d just offered up to me.
We fell quiet as we hunted through the laptop and I cast looks over at the door and the clock from time to time.
My phone buzzed after a while and my heart leapt a little as I checked it, finding a message on the group chat for all five of us. I swear I’d left this chat a hundred times, but Saint always managed to get me back into it somehow.
Kyan:
Message for Tatum: I'm going to *squid emoji* your *peach emoji* when I get back later.
I snorted a laugh, shooting him a reply quickly.
Tatum:
Not if I *octopus emoji* your *peacock emoji* first.
Blake:
I have an idea for later…*eggplant emoji* x2 + *winky face emoji* + *doughnut emoji*?
Saint:
Fuck you all.
I breathed a laugh and Monroe looked over at his phone, seeing the messages flash up there too. He grabbed it, tossing out