I’ve met, I’m not that stupid.”
“No, I didn’t think you were.” I took out my phone, and dropped into one of the guest chairs. “Send me his contact info.”
Tom dropped his hands and eyed me warily. “Why?”
“Because I’m going to get Greg out of your hair for good.”
He narrowed his eyes.
I beckoned. “Come on. You know I’ve got this.”
He still looked suspicious, but he picked up his phone and tapped the screen a few times. A second later, the contact came through on my phone.
“What’s his last name?” I asked. “Or were you both doing first name only?”
“No, no, his last name is on his email. It’s Pruitt.”
“All right.” I set my phone to hide my number, then sent the call, and as I sat back, said to Tom, “Let the exorcism begin.”
Tom pressed his lips together, fighting a smile, and rolled his eyes.
On the other end, a gruff voice answered, “Hello?”
I cleared my throat and adopted my courtroom voice. “Have I reached Mr. Greg Pruitt?”
There was a brief pause, then a suspicious, “Who wants to know?”
“Mr. Pruitt, my name is Special Agent Leroy Wilson with Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms.”
Another pause. “Uh. Okay?”
I glanced at Tom, who was watching me with a mix of horror and barely-contained amusement. Keeping my face straight and my tone flat, I said, “Mr. Pruitt, my partner and I need to meet with you as soon as possible.”
“Your… You said you’re with ATF?”
“Yes, sir. And we’ve noticed a lot of unusual activity originating from this phone number to a high-level narcotics dealer we’re investigating.”
Tom’s jaw fell open, and I had to fight hard not to laugh.
“A narcotics—” Greg sputtered. “I haven’t been involved with any drug dealers!”
“Mmhmm. But we’ve got you making repeated calls to one Jonathon Thomas Caldwell at…” I’d given him a fake name, but I rattled off Tom’s real cell number. “In fact, there was one made just a minute or so before I reached out to you.”
“I…” The piece clicked into place almost audibly, and Greg’s voice was suddenly shrill with panic. “What the fuck? No! I’m… Look, man, I’m not involved with the guy. Not like that. I just went out with him one time, and—”
I laughed. “You expect me to believe you ‘just went out with him one time’ when you’ve been lighting up his phone the way you have? Listen, I just need you to stay where you are. There are a couple of state troopers on their way, and they’ll escort you to my office for—”
“No! No! I’m not—look, I barely know the guy. I had no idea he was involved in any of that shit.”
“Sure you didn’t. Now, you’re not under arrest, but we do need to ask you some questions about—”
“I don’t know the guy! It was one date! And I wasn’t even going to see him again!”
“So the reason for the repeated phone calls is, what? Because either you’re stalking him, or…?”
Silence. Long, delicious silence. Then he sighed. “I’m not gonna call him again. Not if he’s involved in shit like this. So, uh, thanks for the heads up.”
“Oh, but we still need to talk to you about—”
“No! No one needs—”
“Officers will be at your location in seven minutes. Just stand by.”
He started to protest again, but I ended the call.
Tom stared at me, his expression full of “dude, really?” but he was clearly trying not to laugh.
I flashed him a toothy grin. “I don’t think he’ll be calling you again now that the ATF is watching your phone.”
He snorted and rolled his eyes. Pressing an elbow into the armrest, he rubbed his forehead and groaned. “Taylor, I swear…”
“Pretty sure I wouldn’t have to play suspicious ATF agent for hot French dude from—”
He threw the stress ball so fast, I almost didn’t get out of the way in time. “Now he’s probably going to tell the cops the ATF thinks I’m a dealer.”
“Why? Because he was calling you so much that trained federal agents thought ‘hey, this is fucking weird’ and contacted him?” I shook my head. “He’s too full of himself for that. Even if he thinks you’re really a drug dealer, he has no idea who you actually are, the feds are obviously already on to you, and anyway, he’s not going to rat you out because the only reason he knows is that he was being a pathetic douchebag.” I gestured at Tom’s phone. “A hundred bucks says that thing stays quiet for the rest of—”
The phone buzzed.
My jaw dropped. “What?”
Tom