she want to stay with Josh? Abso-fucking-lutely.
Was she sacrificing everything else she wanted in order to do that? She genuinely didn’t think she was—or that she’d even be tempted to do something like that.
She was pretty certain she wanted this, not because of Josh, but in addition to him. Even if she didn’t get to have him—if he was so hurt and angry he refused to take her back—Mia felt confident saying she’d still rather live in Crowder and teach at Bowman than anywhere else she could think of. It was a place she knew she could be happy, even if she couldn’t have Josh.
But god wouldn’t it be amazing if they could actually be together?
“I don’t think this is about that,” she told Holly finally. “Obviously being able to stay with Josh would be great, but…I think I want this even aside from that. I like it there, and if I can get a permanent job there, I think that’s what I want.” She took another drink of wine and shook her head. “It all kind of hit me while I was doing that stupid interview today. The more Dad talks about my future and all the possibilities waiting for me, the more I want to stay right where I am.” Sighing, she shot a look at her sister. “Have I finally cracked? I’m counting on you to tell me the truth.”
Holly was quiet for a moment. “There’s absolutely nothing wrong with prioritizing your own happiness, and it’s okay if you decide that staying where you are is the best way to do that.” She paused. “Just make damn sure that’s why you’re doing it and not for some other reason.”
Mia shook her head. “I told you, I don’t think I’m doing this for Josh.”
“Okay.” Holly’s eyebrows lifted as she pinned Mia with a pointed stare. “But are you doing it to get back at Dad for his perpetual dickishness?”
“This isn’t about Dad.”
Holly snorted into her wineglass. “Everything’s always a little about Dad.”
“Not this time,” Mia said, feeling defensive. “That’s the point. I’m done trying to please him.”
“Forgive me for being blunt, dearest sister, but I’ve heard that before.” Holly stabbed a finger into Mia’s arm with the force of a power drill. “And if you’re making this decision to piss Dad off, that’s way worse than doing it because you want to stay with your goat farmer boyfriend. At least Josh seems like a great guy who makes you happy. Pissing Dad off doesn’t win you anything worth having.”
While she rubbed her bruised arm, Mia considered her sister’s words.
Making a major life decision to spite her father would be foolish and pathetic. But she didn’t think she was doing that. She had been willing to go along with him for the sake of her career. She would suck it up and let her father work his publicity magic—regardless of how much she hated it—if it would get her something she actually wanted.
The point was that she didn’t want those things anymore. The twenty-year plan she’d made in college was for someone else’s life. It didn’t fit the person she was now.
“This isn’t me giving Dad the finger,” she told Holly firmly. “This is about what I want.”
Holly regarded her, as if she was weighing the truth of this statement. Breaking into a grin, she slapped Mia on the leg. “Good for you. In that case, I say go for it.”
“I think I’m going to.” Mia smiled to herself as she rubbed the painful mark Holly’s slap had left on her leg.
Holly clinked her wineglass against Mia’s and they both drank. “Can I ask you something?” Holly said, cocking her head to one side.
“Shoot.”
“Do you love Josh?”
The question startled Mia. She hadn’t ever allowed herself to consider the possibility or even think about the word love in proximity to the word Josh. Not when there was no hope of a future for them.
But now…
Now there might be a hope.
Could she fit love and Josh into the same sentence? Did she love Josh?
The answering starburst of bright, giddy excitement that filled her chest was all the proof she needed.
“Yes,” she said, surprised at how sure she sounded. “I do. I love Josh.”
“Wow.” Holly’s eyes were wide as saucers. “Wow.”
All Mia had to do now was figure out how she was going to get Josh back.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Two days later, Mia was back in Texas.
A palpable sense of relief overcame her as she took the exit off the highway for Crowder. The