was there for your momma when she needed me, Roamyn. I was holding her hand when she gave birth to you and I watched you grow until you were five years old. I didn’t see you as often as I liked, and I sure as hell wasn’t the father or man you and your mom needed me to be. But I was there when I could be. Until the day I couldn’t be.” He sniffs and tilts his chin down. “Back then, the city was in chaos with everyone trying to be on top. The mafia. Local gangs. The cops. Us. It was a fuckin’ mess. Lies and betrayal led Giuseppe Marino to believe we were responsible for the gang rape of his sister. It wasn’t true. We don’t deal in girls and we sure as fuck don’t rape them. But his sister was bitter after she’d been secretly screwing one of my men for a while and he dumped her ass. She lied because she was pissed off. But Giuseppe didn’t care about the truth. He believed her and saw red. You know what the bastard was like. Shoot first, think later. So he came back. Hard. But to teach me a lesson and remind me who runs this town, he killed Catherine.”
Anguish. It falls upon our shoulders with a weight I struggle to carry.
“Your mother was my greatest passion and my biggest weakness, Roamyn. And Giuseppe Marino knew it.”
“So he killed her,” I whisper. Everything falls into place.
Cannon nods. “Yeah, he did. Thank God you hid or he would have killed you too. I’d already lost Catherine and my baby girl she was carrying. I wasn’t going to lose you too. I sent you and your grandma away so he wouldn’t find you. The man wasn’t an idiot. He would have worked out you were mine if he hadn’t already. And we wanted revenge. I wasn’t going to have you around for the aftermath. I thought I was doing the right thing.”
He stares off, his expression pained. Digging up the past looks as brutal for him as it fucking feels having it laid out for me.
Regret etches into his voice. “But I’ve questioned that decision every day since Beth left with you.”
I choke back the strange emotion laying in my throat and get to the question I’m sure he’s waiting for me to ask. “What did you do?”
His eyes harden. “You asking as a son who lost his mother or as a cop?”
“I have no intention of bringing you down for defending her honor, Cannon. I just want to know what happened, so I can finally settle the questions in my head. I’ve been living too long in the past. Marino’s dead now, it’s time to move on.”
He waits a moment before answering. “We killed his lying bitch of a sister. Shot her. Called Marino. He met us at the warehouse where we had his sister’s body. And beside her were the four men who did actually rape her. They were alive. Well, they were until Giuseppe was done with them. He had fucked up and he knew it. My man had fucked up ever getting involved with Marino pussy. I’d be forever chasing revenge on Marino. But we couldn’t keep going the way we were. It was a blood bath every day. It was a war neither of us would win. So we settled the score. For then. Until the day, I got to kill him.”
I fold my arms across my chest. One hand rubs against the shadow on my jaw. “That’s why you’ve always helped us. It never made sense. Not really.”
“Well, I wasn’t doing it for the fuckin’ fun of it. In case you hadn’t noticed, Cole really isn’t one of my favorite fuckin’people. But I had a plan, Roamyn. From the very beginning, I was always going to make that man pay for what he did to Catherine. I’d sent you away because it was the safest and right thing to do. You deserved everything your mother couldn’t have because she got involved with me. I wanted better for you. But that meant losing you, too. This life isn’t for everyone. And back then it was fuck of a lot worse than it is now. I was lucky if I made it through the day without getting shot at and you can bet your ass I slept with one eye open. I’d lost everything I loved most in this fucked up place. I had