the last of his words. He knows. He knows I’m about to close the door on every moment, every laugh, every crazy second we’ve shared together. I can’t move forward with him holding my hand, not anymore. And I can’t fall back to an addiction I won’t escape twice. And I will fall, I’ll fall because I’m still too weak for him. I’m walking a tightrope and one small slip in the wrong direction will send me crashing down. Because I’m powerless against Roamyn Tate and the hold he has over me.
He’s my heart.
My soul.
My Kryptonite.
He’ll be my undoing.
This is how it has to be. At least for now. On my own. Fighting for myself. Dependent on no one because if I were to lose him now, I’ll lose myself too. I can’t be dependent on him to give me a reason for living. I need to be enough, for me. But maybe, just once, for one night, could we forget about everything else and just give in. We can forget about the past, ignore the future and bask in a moment we’ll spend forever chasing.
I bite the inside of my cheek. What am I thinking? I’m not strong enough for just once and our hearts will always want more.
My lips part and heavy breaths fall through my small voice. “One time will never be enough. We both know that.”
His eyes soften. His other arm comes up where he cups my cheek. “You’re right. But I’m hoping once is all it’ll take to make you realize no matter what, we’re always better together than we are apart.”
His hope weighs me down. How can he possibly believe that? We’re chaos and crashes, not roses and happiness.
“We’ve been a lot of things, Roam. But together isn’t one of them.”
I lower my head thinking how time has changed everything.
Years of hearing his smooth voice lift me up and pull me down.
Years of accidental touches, stolen glances, and forbidden feelings.
I fought against us.
He fought for the both of us.
He pulled away.
I pushed back.
We’re a mess. Reckless. Beautiful. Destructive, and I’ve never wanted anything more in my life.
The last of my resolve peels away with the what ifs, maybes and my shameful lack of self-preservation. God, I’m a masochist.
Roamyn lifts my chin, giving me no choice but to look at him. To face what I’ve just allowed to happen.
His hands glide down my sides, firm and slow. Reaching my hips, they splay around my ass. Wetness pools between my thighs and my eyes close, breathing in his touch, his scent, the uneven strumming of my heart. I want to capture every piece of this moment and lock it away, somewhere deep, hidden. Where I can treasure it forever. Roamyn pulls me against him and my hands fly to his hard chest. We’re nose to nose. Lips barely apart. Bodies molding to one when he rolls his hips forward, his hardness thrusting up against me. An inferno rages in my core. Light moans fall from my lips, spurring on my hands that are now gripping his thick, muscled arms. My breathing, needy. My body, anxious.
His hands loosen around my ass and glide under my top, all the way up to my breasts where he pulls the cups back and grazes my nipples. He rubs over the tight buds and a shiver shoots up my spine. I arch my back into him and he kisses my shoulders, my neck, across my cheek, trying to bring us impossibly closer. His thigh meshes between my legs and I grind against him, all inhibitions gone. I bite down on my lip to hold in everything I want to say but know I shouldn’t. And somehow he knows, I can see it in his frown, those eyebrows all drawn in. His square jaw, tight with anticipation, just waiting for me to come to my senses and put a stop to this. But his hungry almond eyes contradict every other feeling. Lust swirls behind them and the look, one I’m so familiar with, one I’ve committed to memory stares back at me with as much fire inside his eyes as I feel coursing through my body.
A minute passes, or maybe it’s seconds. “Good. Because I’ve waited far too fucking long to do this.”
All air escapes me as his face descends on mine. His lips conceal any coherent response. Our tongues tangle with unrelenting need. Fingers twirl through my hair until Roamyn knots it in his hand followed by a gentle tug. The