I had a better plan or, like, a boom box or something.”
“Would it play Peter Gabriel?”
“That was a good song. But nah, probably I’d pick that one you love by the Jonas Brothers. ‘Only Human’? Goddammit. See.” I pointed an accusing finger up at him. “This is you doing your Jesse thing. You’re deflecting. Classic defense. You’re really fucking good at it, and honestly, it’s kind of one of the things I like about you.” I frowned. That had slipped in there. Whatever. “Like really, really like. Like…love about you, actually.” I peered up at him, unnerved by how absolutely awful I was at anything approaching romance. Maybe I should just cut to the chase. “I want you to be mine. My partner, my boyfriend, whatever you want to call it. Call me traditional, but I want it to be official. I don’t want there to be any fucking doubt who you’re with. I don’t want to have to look to you and try to figure out how to answer. I want it to be well-known. I’m sorry for causing more of a scene with Reid, but I saw him next to you and it pissed me off and I reacted impulsively. The idea of you with anyone else turns my stomach.”
“It does?”
I nodded. “You’re the first person I look for in any room. I hear you louder than anyone else. Even when you’re quiet. Sometimes especially when you’re quiet. I’ve never wanted to be with someone else as much as I want to be with you. Making you happy makes me happy. I’ve never felt that with someone else either. Everything about you makes me feel impulsive and excitable, and it’s both scary and exhilarating as hell.”
Jesse’s lips formed a soft O, and I couldn’t tell whether or not that was a good thing. But when in doubt, offense. “So here’s what I know is true. One, this is definitely the worst love declaration ever, and I’m sorry about that. I’ll try to think of something better and we can have a redo if you’ll let me. Two, I want to watch GBBO with you every day. I want to study with you and be with you and cuddle with you, and sleep in your bed and do…fuck…do all the really sexy things we’ve been doing together that I had no idea I was missing until I met you. You have the softest lips, and even kissing you is hotter that any sex I’ve ever had.” I swept a hand back through my hair, and it came away damp with nervous sweat. “You told me not to fall in love with you, and I failed. I usually hate failing anything. But I’m not sorry this time.”
“You love me?” Jesse whispered, and I nodded, starting to rise. “Don’t get up yet!”
“Okay.” I waited, dimly aware of the crowd still on the field behind Jesse, and my family, along with Nate, Eric, Reid, Mark, and Chet staring at us.
“Say that part about my lips being soft again. And then tell me who killed Elspeth in book six.”
“Your lips are soft, and you’re a really good kisser. The best. You’re also great at cooking, which I’ve always said. You’re smart, and funny, and being around you makes me feel really good, like everything will be all right. You’re a great cuddler, and you’re not a pushover, though I know you think you are sometimes. That’s because you’re a genuinely fucking nice person who cares about other people, and that’s not a defect, it’s a fucking asset, Jesse.” I sucked in a breath. “Heinrich killed Elspeth in book six, which also pissed me off, and since we’re being brutally honest, I really wanted to quit then, but I had this whole game plan about how I was going to finish the entire series and then casually drop spoilers into conversation one day and impress you.”
“That would’ve been impressive. But this isn’t bad either.” Jesse grabbed my jersey and tugged, urging me upright and looping his arms around my neck. His warm hands cupped my sweaty cheeks, and his magnetic eyes snared my gaze as he lifted onto the balls of his feet.
I felt the kiss he brushed over lips all the way to the marrow of my bones.
“I’m totally going to cry now,” he whispered and tipped his head toward the sky, but I angled his face right back down and then gently swiped my thumbs over his tears.
He buried his face against