we meshed. Corinne, me, and Nessa were just good friends. I’ll hate every day that Corinne isn’t here to see what happens with the rest of the world, and I hate that she’s not going to graduate or thrive in her career. I hate that she won’t find someone to marry. I hate that she’s not going to have the family she wanted. But that doesn’t mean I’m replacing her in my life with you. Your friends aren’t doing it either.”
She looked at me then and wiped away a tear. I wanted to pull her close, hold her, kiss her and tell her that everything would be okay. But in case I was sick with something contagious, I didn’t. I just leaned back and stared at her, willing her to understand that she meant something to me.
“I’m glad that we all talk about her because she deserves so much more than what she got in the end. And it’s on me that I feel like some weird replacement, but then again, sometimes I feel that…well, I shouldn’t say it,” she said and shook her head.
I frowned. “Just tell me. You’re my friend, too. And something more. We both know that.”
I hadn’t meant to say that last bit, but she looked at me and swallowed hard. “I think that might be part of the problem.”
I froze, something inside me twisting. “What’s part of the problem? What are you talking about?”
“As I said before, I think we messed up.”
“How did we do that?”
“Pacey, this might not be my place, but I think it needs to be—”
“Just spit it out,” I growled, annoyed with myself more than her.
She pressed her lips together and nodded. “I think Nessa’s in love with you,” she whispered.
My eyes widened, and I nearly laughed. “No, she isn’t,” I said, and Mackenzie winced.
“I think she is,” she murmured.
“No, she isn’t. She’s my friend. There may be a kind of love there with the friendship, but it’s nothing more than that. We’re not like that.”
She shook her head. “I kept ignoring the way she looked at you because I thought it was just friendship. Maybe I didn’t want to see you differently either. But she’s changed since you and I slept together. Now that we’re spending so much time together.”
“Changed how?” I asked, my voice cool. I needed it to be. I couldn’t think, couldn’t focus. Because Mackenzie had to be wrong.
“Nessa’s been a bit cold around me, a little more distant. And even sometimes far too bright, as if she’s hurting inside. And it’s all my fault. I thought it was because I had stepped into Corinne’s shoes at the house, but I don’t think it’s that. I believe it’s something more. I think I screwed up. There’s a code. You’re not supposed to be with the guy your friend crushes on. And yet, I’m doing that.” She looked at me then, her eyes pleading. I wanted to ignore her, wanted to walk away. “I really think Nessa’s in love with you, Pacey.”
I blinked, trying to catch up, my breathing now labored—though I didn’t think that part was from the news.
I snorted, trying to laugh. “You’re wrong. There’s no way she loves me. We’re mates, she and I. That’s it. I know some people don’t understand that you can be friends with a girl, but you can, and I am.”
She shook her head. “Guys and girls can be friends. And I believe that on your end, it’s only friendship,” she said quickly.
“You’re damn right, it is,” I growled.
She pulled back, and I wanted to curse. “Mackenzie,” I began.
She shook her head. “Maybe I’m wrong. I hope I am, but I see the way she looks at you now that I’m letting myself see. I notice how she tries not to. And I can feel how she’s starting to hate me because I swooped in and took you away out of nowhere.”
“You’re wrong,” I growled. “She was never meant to be mine. She isn’t mine. She’s my friend. Don’t twist this,” I said, scared now.
She reached out, gripped my knee, and swallowed hard. “Maybe I’m wrong. I want to be wrong. Maybe I’m just having one of those times where I read too much into everything. And that’s on me. I’m sorry if I ruined things between you and Nessa or between us or made things difficult. But I need you to know this. I’m so sorry. All of this is on me. If something changes between you and Nessa,