Since the death of Echo, everything has been very calm. Are you sure that journal said it was two Lycans?”
“Sorry,” I say, nodding at Roman. I know how hard this is for me, but it must be harder for him. He’s trusted his alphas for lifetimes. For them to betray him like this… I can’t help but feel responsible.
“You have nothing to be sorry for,” he sighs, running his hand through his hair. “It just means that I might have to go to the compound and interrogate myself. It’s not that I don’t trust Theron & Tobias to get to the bottom of it, but there’s nothing quite like being interrogated by your alpha.”
“I don’t think we should be splitting up unless absolutely necessary,” Levi says, voicing the thoughts inside my head. Even if those thoughts make me an uber needy bitch.
“I won’t go unless absolutely necessary,” Roman agrees, and I smile softly at him.
“Anything else we need to catch up on tonight? I’m beat, and my mom wants to see me tomorrow,” Creek says, stretching out as he stands.
No one says anything, so I stand too, and the others follow suit. Levi grabs my hand as I go to leave the room, and the others leave, giving us some time alone.
“How are you doing?” he asks, his gaze taking me in, practically piercing my soul. His hand cups my cheek and I lean into his touch.
“I’m okay, I think. Still processing a lot,” I tell him softly.
“Avoiding processing you mean,” he says with a smirk and I roll my eyes.
“What if I am? We have a lot going on.”
“Not as much as we have had. If you need a minute to breathe, you can take it. We can take care of everything,” he offers, it’s sweet, but he knows as well as I do, I don’t let others deal with my mess.
“Thank you, but no. This insanity is only on you all because of me. I’m not going to run away and let you just handle it. For the minute I’m okay. If that changes, I’ll let you know.”
“Promise?”
“I promise.”
After trying to retreat to my room last night, I got picked up and carried to Levi’s, where everyone ended up piling in. I can’t say I’m upset about it. With everything that’s been going on, being around my guys brings me a semblance of peace. Even if they’re not always so happy about everyone doing the whole puppy pile thing, apparently everyone could tell that I needed each of them.
Levi was right, I’m definitely avoiding dealing with stuff, but I’m worried if I start trying, a tsunami is going to hit me, and I’m not sure I’ll survive it. But being around them dulls the fear that everything inside of me is going to consume me. Let’s not even start about me avoiding what it is I’m capable of with shadow fire at my disposal.
Just nope.
Today is not the day I’m going to try and unravel it all.
When I woke this morning, I was alone, but there was a note telling me that they’re all off running errands of one form or the other, meaning I have some time alone. A knock breaks my train of thought before the door opens.
“My Remy girl… I brought you breakfast! Those boys went out, doing all the things, so I thought you’d enjoy a nice relaxing morning. Nothing better for that than bacon and French toast!” Nonnie’s joyful voice makes me smile as she places the tray over my lap and fusses around me.
“Thank you, Nonnie. You didn’t have to do this.”
“Psssh,” she hisses as she waves me off. “Remy girl, I’ve never seen Kain with more light in his eyes than when you are in his life. For that alone, you deserve the world, but the way you accept my Luc, accept all of us, despite the prejudice around you, you looked past it all. You are special, Remy girl. You deserve to be spoiled, every day of your life.” Her words make my eyes prick with tears. I blink to keep them from falling as she takes my hands. “I hope whoever started all of this crazy business you’re all dealing with finds a painful and lengthy death, so that you can finally find the peace you deserve.”
She wipes one of the tears away, and kisses my cheek before leaving me alone with my grief, and a warmth in my heart I feared I wouldn’t feel again with Everly no