as I’d expected.
Raf’s predilections were well-known enough. I mean, half the band’s costumes were fetish gear, so it was no surprise Sterling had honed in on that. Fucking with Raf meant fucking with Drake, and if I had learned one thing about Sterling, it was that he hated Drake far more than he liked anyone else.
A random assistant put a leash in Jacob’s hand a minute later, like they just kept that shit around. And they probably did. I swallowed the shame crawling its way up my throat as he swept my hair back and put the collar around my neck.
He’d fastened it a little too tight, but I could still breathe, and I knew it was probably intentional, so I didn’t say anything. Sterling had zero tolerance for “antics,” as he put it. The kind of shit that always resulted in Dante’s Infernal being weeks if not months behind schedule, back before Dante had Cash to keep him in line. My new manager loved framing me as a choir-boy-turned-rebellious-hellion for the press, but I knew better than to say as much as “hello” unnecessarily. In the world of Crane Records, Sterling was God, and Jacob was his right hand. I was just the puppet that hand happened to be shoved inside.
“Man, that’s hot,” Sam remarked as Jacob started biting my neck. I shivered involuntarily, turning my head even though I knew I couldn’t get away if I wanted to.
Well…I did want to, but shit like that didn’t matter anymore. I’d thought Drake kept me on a short leash, but I missed being invisible. Not having my every waking moment posed and contrived and observed by a crowd of voyeurs who all wanted their pound of flesh.
Was this really the way it had been for Dante all these years? I felt trapped enough as an adult, and I’d only been Crane Records’ “it boy” for a few months.
“Unzip his pants,” Sam said, right when I was sure Jacob’s teeth were going to break the skin. He liked making me squirm, and he was good at it. Not as good as Rafael, and for entirely different reasons, but good. “Chaz, that expression you’re making is perfect. Can you act like you’re struggling a little? Very risque.”
Yeah, act…
I clenched my jaw and turned my head to put as much space as I could between us. Jacob, on the other hand, seemed to have no hesitation about groping me in front of a room full of strangers. This was the furthest it had gone, and I was about to call it off even if I knew Sterling would make me pay the price later.
Instead, when I tried to speak, my throat was too tight to get the words out. At first, I thought the collar had somehow tightened, but that wasn’t it. It certainly wasn’t helping when I already felt like I couldn’t breathe, though. The heat of the lights and the drum of my heart both intensified, and it felt like there was something crawling all over my skin. I tried to pull out of Jacob’s grasp, but he just gripped me tighter, probably assuming it was part of the act.
“Stop,” I finally managed to get out, sinking back against the wall completely as my knees gave out on me. “Please.”
Jacob ignored my pleas, probably assuming it was just part of the “act.” I used my free hand to shove against his chest and yelled as loud as I could, “I said stop!”
It still came out hoarse and breathy, but Jacob froze and looked at me with an expression of genuine confusion, so I knew it had gotten the message across. The faint ambient noise in the room went silent, but I was too busy trying to claw the collar off to care.
“Hey, it’s okay,” Jacob said in the first gentle tone I’d heard from him. “I can take it off, let me help.”
“No!” I hissed, scrambling back from him like a cornered animal. On one level, I knew he was trying to help, but the panic had coiled too tightly around me to be rational.
I finally managed to get the collar’s buckle undone, but I could feel the hot streams of blood and sweat trickling down my neck, so I knew I’d clawed myself up in the process. I was too wired to even feel the pain.
Time seemed to slow down for me, while it sped up around me. Jacob just stood there staring at me in bewilderment for a few