usual.
“For once, he actually has reason, that’s what,” I informed him, walking over with a blender bottle. “Drink this.”
He took it, sniffed the contents and grimaced. “What is it?”
“It’s fruit. This shit that grows on trees and actually has things your body can convert to energy,” I answered flatly. “Come on. Drink up. Just pretend it’s vodka.”
He gave me a look and drank two whole sips before blanching.
“Oh, come on, it tastes fine,” I scoffed, beginning the task of collecting all the empty bottles around the couch and putting them into the recycling bin. “Holy shit, Chaz, what did you do, clear out every liquor shop in West Hollywood?”
“Most of those bottles were almost empty.”
I looked up from an armful of glass. “So you’re lying to me now?”
“I’m not lying, I just think you’re making a big deal out of nothing.”
“Nothing?” I challenged, walking back over to the couch once I’d dumped the first load of bottles. “You’ve been a nervous wreck in the studio, zoning out constantly, and now you’re not even showing up. It’s like you’re possessed by the spirit of old Dante.”
“Dante,” he muttered, picking up a half-empty bottle on the end table and taking a swig. “It’s always about Dante, isn’t it?”
I watched him, frowning. “You’re slurring, so I’m not gonna take anything you say too personally, but you might wanna quit while you’re ahead.”
He snorted. “That’s why you’re here, isn’t it? He sent you to check up on the loser.”
I snatched the bottle from him before he could take another sip. “I’m here because I’m fucking worried about you. You’re not yourself.”
“I’m not?” he challenged, getting up from the couch. I thought he was going to try to take the booze back, but he didn’t. “Pretty sure I’m the same as I’ve always been. But that’s the problem, right? Everyone else gets bigger and better, but there’s always the one fuck-up holding everyone back.”
“I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about,” I told him, taking his face in my hands so he had no choice but to meet my eyes. His were so glazed, I wasn’t even sure how he was functioning. “You’re not a fuck-up, you’re just fucked up right now, and I can help if you’ll just talk to me.”
“Help, huh? You sure that’s why you came here?” he scoffed, running his hands up my chest as he pressed himself against me. He leaned in to press a Hennessy kiss against my lips.
I pushed him away, keeping my hands on his shoulders. “Chaz, stop.”
“What? That’s the only reason you ever come here,” he protested. “Because you need a fill-in, right? So just stop pretending and fuck me already.”
It took me a second to process his words, but no matter how much I wanted to believe it was just drunken nonsense, he said it with way too much conviction. This was something he’d already thought about, and the liquor had just loosened his tongue enough to say it.
“You don’t know what you’re saying,” I finally gritted out, even though we probably both knew that wasn’t true. “Let’s get you back to bed.”
“No!” he cried, shoving me off him. “You’re not my fucking babysitter, so if all you wanted to do was come here and tell me what a mess I am, you didn’t need to make the trip. I’m well aware, so just fuck off.”
My eyes narrowed. “You don’t mean that.”
“I know what I fucking mean,” he hissed. “And I know what I mean to you, so just get out before one of us says something we’re both going to regret.”
I hesitated, torn between the need to diffuse the situation and knowing I was on the verge of making it worse if we both didn’t get some time to cool off.
“I think it’s a little late for that,” I said, tossing the half-empty bottle into the trash on my way out the door. “Call me when you’re sober, whenever the hell that is.”
Come to think of it, I couldn’t remember the last time he had been.
Chapter 5
Chaz
I barely remembered the other day when Rafael came over, but I remembered enough to know there was no way I could face him again. Usually, he was the person I went to when I needed to vent about some stupid shit I’d done. The one who would talk me down from the ledge and tell me it wasn’t really all that bad.
And I’d told him to fuck off.
You chase everyone off sooner or later. Did you