tour stops. You coming, Raf?”
“No,” he answered, leaning against the wall with his arms folded over his chest. “Looks like we’ve got a late night ahead of us.”
I looked at Rafael in confusion, and Dante seemed to be having the same issue.
“Oh. Right,” he said awkwardly as Cash buttoned up his jacket. “Well, see you.”
Once they were gone, I turned to Raf. “You don’t need to stay. Your parts are done.”
“I’m not leaving you here alone with a sound tech I barely know and our asshole manager,” he said, loud enough that it was clear he didn’t care if Drake overheard.
As distressed as I was by the idea of him ruining his evening over me, I had to admit, I was touched he was looking out for me like that. He was the only one who ever had, and it was...nice.
Nice was an understatement, but I had to downplay it in my head so I wouldn’t think about the fact that if things didn’t work out between us, I’d be losing so much more than a fuck buddy.
I’d be losing...everything.
“Okay,” I said quietly. “Thanks. I’ll try to hurry.”
“Don’t worry about it. We’ll just order in, and make a night of it.”
“That sounds great, but really, I don’t want to mess things up any more than I already have.””
He frowned, and I chastised myself for being too needy. Damn, I was annoying. If I annoyed myself, I knew I had to annoy him ten times more. He was just as angelic as his namesake, so he hid it better than most people.
“It’s not a big deal, Chaz,” he finally said. “Of course I want to stay with you. And you haven’t messed anything up. Drake and Dante are the ones who dropped this on you last minute.”
“Yeah, but…”
“But what?” he challenged, wandering over to me. He rested his hands on my shoulders and I melted like I always did. There wasn’t just lust in his gaze this time, though. There was tenderness. The kind he showed when I was in pup mode, but it didn’t usually transfer outside the bedroom. “Why do you take responsibility for everything? You know, it’s okay to say no.”
I looked away, hoping he wouldn’t catch on to my doubt. “I know that.”
“Do you?” He tilted my chin toward him. “Because I think you’re afraid to put your wants and needs over anyone else’s, and that scares the hell out of me.”
His words caught me off-guard, and all I could do was stare in confusion. “Why?”
“Because I care about you, for one thing,” he said, as if that should be obvious. “For another, how the hell am I supposed to take care of you if you’re not honest with me? If I don’t know you’ll tell me when you don’t like something. If I hurt you.”
“That’s not an issue,” I said, stepping closer. He was so warm. I felt safe whenever I was with him, so the idea seemed absurd to me. “I trust you.”
He sighed, and I could tell the answer wasn’t the one he wanted, but I didn’t know what he did want and I hated it. I just wanted to please him. To make him happy. Everyone I loved, really, but especially him.
“Come on,” he said, rubbing my shoulder. “The tech’s probably waiting.”
“Yeah,” I said, glancing over at the booth. “Um. Where is the tech?”
He followed my gaze and scowled. “You’ve gotta be kidding me. They didn’t even bother to tell him to stick around?”
“Guess not,” I sighed, taking out my phone to text our manager. I didn’t like interacting with him any more than necessary, but I didn’t have any other option. “I’ll text Drake and see if he can get someone down here.”
“Don’t bother,” Raf said, walking over to the booth. “I’ve got it.”
“Seriously?”
He leaned in the doorway with a lopsided grin on his face. “I have some skills beyond guitar, y’know.”
“Oh, I know,” I said before I could stop myself. I turned away so he wouldn’t see the heat flooding my face, but I could feel him smirking at me as I got set up again.
I’d expected recording the bass lines would take the whole night, but we finished in record time and for once, I wasn’t stumbling over myself. I was comfortable around Raf, which was probably it. Not having Dante to micromanage or Drake watching my every move like he was looking for an excuse to cut the weakest link in the chain helped.
“Alright, we’re good,” Raf said through