again and again, as hard as we can, as many times as it takes.” She bites her lip. “What do you think?”
Phoebe had tried to put her earlier conversation with Coach at the Psych-Up out of her mind. She couldn’t tell anyone about what had happened, least of all Mel. But Phoebe knew she was the reason, or at least a reason, behind his angry speech tonight.
Mel’s idea is a couple of notches higher than where Phoebe set the bar for herself for tomorrow’s game. Phoebe sees now that higher is where she must aim. After how badly she screwed up with Coach, it won’t be enough for Phoebe to simply play well tomorrow. She’ll need to play better than her best to repair what she’s damaged.
Not only that, but Phoebe suspects that Mel might be in exactly the same spot she is with Coach. Desperate to prove that the Wildcats’ top scorer can and will deliver.
How amazing then, that they can attack this problem on the field together. Suddenly, it seems to Phoebe more possible than not that they’ll be able to solve it.
“I’m in!”
Mel springs up. “Yay! This is going to be so great!” She jogs backward toward midfield, where the rest of the team is standing around. Phoebe moves more slowly.
The girls were friendly before field hockey, but during their time in the eighth-grade summer skills camp, Phoebe and Mel got tighter by the sheer fact that they were clearly the best of their peers. Mel was on a whole other level, and Phoebe was always working to keep up. But she liked that. On the girls’ basketball team, there would have been no one to push her. She’d have been the one carrying the team.
And when they each got the call from Coach inviting them to join the varsity tryouts that summer before high school, both girls were hopeful of course, but also nervous and wanting to be sensitive that the other maybe didn’t get the call. They hadn’t yet gotten to the point of sharing nearly everything with each other.
Umm. Hi was about as brave a text as Mel could manage to send her.
Ummmmm!!!!!! HIIIIIIIIII, Phoebe texted back.
Being the only two freshmen on the team, they would sit together at the front of the bus, claiming the fourth seat behind the driver. As they got older and gained more seniority, the girls could have moved toward the back, but they never did. They liked their seat. They’d memorized the pen graffiti written there, accepted that their window was the only one on the bus that wouldn’t open.
Neither girl, individually, was particularly superstitious, but together they developed a hundred little rituals over the years to ensure a victory. They packed certain snacks, depending on the day of the week and type of game. Tuesday scrimmage meant they split a Kit Kat. Saturday mornings, a salt bagel with cream cheese. Before games they tied each other’s cleats. They would hit play on their playlists only after the bus had left the school parking lot.
It certainly didn’t hurt matters that Phoebe played midfield and Mel left forward, two inseparable positions. They clicked in that way too, a deep trust forming between them. It was beyond intuitive. They always knew where the other was on the field.
Field hockey became a year-round sport. The regular season was followed by spring club league, the Thanksgiving showcase in Florida, Kissawa summer camp, summer league. Plus both girls were alternates in the National U-18 team two years ago.
Outside of their relationship on the field, their personalities complemented each other in real life. Mel was shy and reserved, but Phoebe knew how to get her to be silly, unguarded. Like the time, for Phoebe’s birthday, that Mr. Holt took the girls on an overnight trip to see the Cavs play in Cleveland. She made them each a T-shirt to wear, KING and JAMES, and together they would dance to every song played over the PA system, hoping to make it on the jumbotron screen.
As close as they are, Phoebe’s injury shed light on some aspects of Mel’s personality that either Phoebe hadn’t seen before or just straight-up ignored. Like how much Mel actually relies on her. How quickly Mel’s confidence, which seemed part of her DNA, could slip away. How uncomfortable Mel is with being vulnerable.
If anything, these revelations make Phoebe feel more warmly toward her best friend. They help her make sense of things. Why Mel wants them so badly to play, if