study, stress, and long hours were over, for better or worse. 33% of us would pass. The rest would put in more study and stress to come back next year and try again. Or quit. I prayed to whatever god would listen that I was not one of them.
I veered away from the bar, and headed to the elevator bank. An attractive young woman in a black skirt and white blouse got into the elevator with me. Her blonde hair was up in a twist and her perfume filled the small space.
“Bar exam?” she asked.
“Yep.”
“Me too.”
I was facing forward, but I felt her eyes rake me up and down. She shifted an inch closer to me.
“Why don’t sharks eat lawyers?” she asked.
I smiled faintly. “I think I’ve heard this one before.”
“I’m sure you’ve heard a million of them,” she said. “So? Why don’t sharks eat lawyers?”
“Professional courtesy,” I said.
She laughed. “Indeed. Your turn.”
I scrolled through my mental database. “How do you save a drowning lawyer?”
“How?”
“Take your foot off his head.”
The woman laughed again, and the elevator dinged her floor. She stood with her back against the door to hold it open, affording me a full view of her slender body and her breasts pushing against the silk of her blouse.
“So listen, that exam was a monster,” she said. “Want to have a drink with me? To celebrate? I may have already started a little bit at the bar,” she said with a small laugh, “but you can catch up.”
God, here it was; one of my oldest fantasies since I decided to become a lawyer come to life. A previous version of myself, the kind that had parties and never went on dates—only hookups—would’ve taken this woman up on her offer without a second thought. Hell, I would have made the offer.
And now…
I smiled thinly. “No, thanks. I’m with…someone.”
“Someone?” the woman said. “Girlfriend?”
I tried the thought on for size.
Darlene’s my girlfriend.
It didn’t fit. One failed date and a few kisses did not a girlfriend make. We hadn’t even slept together, yet I felt closer to her than I’d ever had to a woman; my feelings for her ran so deep they scared me. But she wasn’t my girlfriend. The word was both too strong and not enough at the same time.
“Darlene is someone special,” I said.
“Oh God, say no more,” the woman said. “I was hoping I’d caught you early, but the way your entire face changed when you said her name…” She shook her head with a rueful sigh. “I’m too late.”
She shouldered her purse and let the doors close, giving me a little knowing smirk and a small wiggle of her fingers goodbye.
The shiny silver doors shut, leaving me to stare at my own reflection. A blurred face of exhaustion, and a smile that I hadn’t realized I’d been wearing.
I’d planned to take the bus back in the morning in the event the test ran late, but as I got back to my hotel room, I was torn. My exhausted brain cried out for sleep, while my heart demanded I jump on the next bus back to Olivia and Darlene.
I picked up my phone and punched in Darlene’s number.
“Hi,” she said softly when she picked up. “Done?”
“Yeah, I’m done,” I said. I hadn’t called her or Jackson while in Sacramento in an effort to stay focused. In two syllables, how much I missed her came roaring back.
“How do you think it went?” she asked.
“I did my best,” I said, and a ragged breath gusted out of me. I lay back against the pillows on the bed as one part of the tremendous pressure I’d been carrying, lifted off. “Yeah,” I said, wiping my eyes in the crook of my elbow. “I did my best for Olivia. And for you. For us. Whatever we are after the hearing on Friday.”
“Oh, Sawyer,” she said, her own voice tremulous. “I’m proud of you. And I know someone else who is proud of you too. Want to say hello to Olivia?”
I sat up. “She’s there? Where are you?”
“I’m at your place. I’ve been staying here the past couple of days with Olivia. And the Abbotts.”
“You have?” I shook my head. “What…why? What’s happening?”
“Olivia missed you too much. Being here in her home has helped. And being with me has helped too,” she added in a small voice. “It’s kind of amazing, but this little human likes being with me. I feel…honored, if that makes any sense.”
I had to clench my jaw for a