Take care, now, and call if you need anything.”
I just did.
“Sure, Mom.” I wiped my cheek with the heel of my hand. “I’ll talk to you soon. Love you.”
“Love you too. Bye, now.”
I let my hand fall in my lap.
“Stop feeling sorry for yourself,” I muttered, but the ache in my heart wouldn’t go away.
A text came in on the phone in my lap from Max.
I need to see you. Work, home, or dance?
Home. Second floor, I typed back, and my heart sank even lower. You’d better not be coming over here to tell me what I think you’re coming over here to tell me.
I’ll tell you when I get there.
Smartass, I tapped, but the ache in my chest deepened.
Twenty minutes later, a soft knock came at the door.
I opened it to Max, and stepped into the hallway, leaving the door ajar.
“The baby’s sleeping,” I said. “And you’re leaving, aren’t you?”
He nodded. “I got the call. My flight leaves in a few hours.”
“I’m so proud of you, Max.”
“Are you?” The softness in his voice and the tears in his eyes shocked me. “I may have been your sponsor, but you’ve also been a friend. It means a lot to me, what you think.”
“Thank you,” I said. “No one’s said anything like that to me in a long time.”
I put my arms around him and held him tight. He held me tighter.
“You’re going to do great,” I said. “Going back to Seattle’s going to be the best thing for you. You can maybe reconcile with your parents, and you’ll definitely meet some hot doctor who is going to love you. How could he not?”
Max kept hugging me. “You’re going to be okay, too. I know it.”
“I don’t. I feel like everyone I care about is moving farther and farther away and I can’t hold on to anyone. My family, Sawyer, you. And I feel that other rock bottom coming. I wish you could be here when it does.”
He pulled away to look at me, concern heavy in his dark eyes.
“I hate that I’m leaving right now. Maybe I should postpone…”
“Don’t you dare,” I said. “I need to deal with this on my own, I think. Maybe that’s why you got the transfer now. Everything happens for a reason, right?”
“It does,” he said. “And you’re so much stronger than you know. You’ve come far, Darlene. Hold on to that. And call me. Any time.” He gave me a stern look. “And don’t skip any meetings. Not one, or I’ll have to fly back, away from my hot doctor boyfriend.”
I laughed. “I’m going to miss you.”
“Miss you too.”
I hugged him until I heard footfalls on the stairs. Sawyer stood at the end of the hallway. He stared at me in Max’s arms, and his hand resting on his shoulder bag dropped to his side.
I took a step back from Max. “Hi, Sawyer.”
Max whipped his head around and the action prompted Sawyer to stride up to us, eyes forward, his face unreadable. Blank. And that worried me more than anything else.
“Hey, man,” Max said, offering his hand. “Max Kaufman. Good to meet you.”
Sawyer stopped in the door. He stared down at Max’s offered hand, then met my eye for one blood-curdling second before pushing past us into his apartment.
“He had a very important hearing,” I whispered. “I don’t think it went well. God, I’m so scared for him.”
“I hate that I have to leave you like this,” Max said. “I’ll call you when I land.”
He kissed my cheek and I watched him until he was down the stairs and out of sight. I suddenly felt like a tightrope walker strung up between two high-rises.
And my safety net just left to get on a plane to Seattle.
Inside Sawyer’s place, he was shaking off his suit coat that was smattered with rain. He tossed it on the back of his chair, then loosened his tie.
“Where is Olivia?” he asked. No, demanded.
“Sleeping. She’s fine. She’s…sleeping.”
“You can’t just bring strangers into my place. With my kid. You know that, right?”
“I know, I’m sorry,” I said. “He didn’t come in, I promise. He’s—”
“He’s what?” Sawyer asked. “Your drug dealer?”
The blood drained from my head, leaving me dizzy. I reeled. “My…what?” I breathed.
“Were you ever going to tell me?” Sawyer demanded.
“Tell you…?”
“About your criminal record?”
There they were, those three words in all their ugly glory. My criminal record. But how was it coming up now?
“Yes, I was going to tell you,” I said, my voice weak and watery. “I wanted