The same goes for me, kind of. As long as I’m at the Facility, I don’t have to worry about paying for my toothbrushes, toothpaste, and all the essential things in life, but they’re not my guardian. They’re not legally responsible to provide for me like that.”
“Okay, but I still don’t see why I can’t spoil you.”
“Griff…” I give him a look. “There’s a difference between spoiling a girl and taking over her life.”
“I’m not trying to take over.” His brows draw down. “Is that what you think? I’m only trying to help out.”
“You asked me to explain, and I’m trying to do that.”
“I’m trying to listen. I really want to understand, but I don’t get why it’s such a big deal.”
“Well, all the other kids there get a modest allowance, but I came to the Facility a few months shy of turning twenty-one. An allowance didn’t fit my unique circumstance, but they figured out a way for me to earn a small stipend.”
“And you should save that for things you want, not to buy things you need. Not when I’m perfectly capable of doing that for you.”
“Griff, there’s no way for this not to sound horrible.” I cringe with what I need to say. It’s the comparison I avoid but is always in the back of my head. “My Masters provided everything I needed.”
“Oh…” He takes a step back. “I see.” From the look in his eyes, he totally gets it. Finally. Like on a gut level. I see the mortification in his expression as he processes what I’m trying to say.
“I told you it sounded bad, and I’m not comparing you to them. Those men were horrible men. You’re wonderful, but it’s… It’s not a trigger, but it is a thing. Please understand. I need to buy my own things.”
“I would never presume to take over control like that.”
“I know.” I place my hand on his arm. “You’re a remarkable man, and it’s in your genes to help others out. But maybe you don’t have to help me in this?”
“Was last night…” He clears his throat, clearly uncomfortable. “When I tied you to the bed? Was that… Did I step over the line?”
“Oh God, no.” I lift on tiptoe and kiss his cheek. “You and I are wired the same way when it comes to that. Maybe it doesn’t make sense that I like it. I love it, by the way. Please don’t stop.” I pat his forearm, trying to reassure him. “I see how throwing a fit when you want to buy my clothes can be confusing.”
“It’s not confusing. It makes perfect sense, and I had no idea that’s how you perceived it. Can’t say I’m not relieved about sex though, because you and I in bed are fucking on fire.” He draws me close and plants a devastating kiss that leaves me breathless. When he releases me, he stares down at me with passion smoldering in his gaze. “I meant to sit down and talk with you about that. I don’t want to activate triggers or push things too fast.”
“You can tie me up all you want. Fuck me hard and as vigorously as you want. I don’t even mind if you order me around during sex. You remember that spanking you gave me?”
His grin lifts into a full-on smirk. “Yes, little minx, I remember that well.”
I return his smirk with a cheeky grin. “I kind of liked that too, but maybe we draw the line there? Authoritarian, domineering men are definitely a trigger for me.”
“And, outside of sex, we draw the line at me buying your clothes.”
“If that’s okay?” My shoulders lift. I hate putting any limits on our relationship, but I’m slowly realizing I need some boundaries.
The fact that Griff doesn’t fight me on any of it is a testament to how incredibly understanding and wonderful he is.
“I know nothing about your finances, and it may have been wrong to assume. I thought I was helping, not activating triggers.”
“Oh, you assumed right. I’m dirt poor, but I have way more than I ever did on the street. Honestly, being able to buy the things I need for myself, by myself, is probably the most liberating thing in my life right now.”
“Message received. And, Moira?”
“Yeah.”
“Thank you for taking the time to explain. I appreciate your willingness to talk this through instead of bottling it up and letting it fester. I’m not used to living with another person—I’ve never lived with a woman before—and I’m more