movie.’
‘Since when have you cried at movies?’
‘Since I got pregnant,’ she flared.
Ben picked up the remote from her bedside table and switched the television off. ‘Problem solved.’
‘I was watching that!’
Ignoring her, Ben pulled up a chair and placed it beside the bed. ‘Katya, please...I want to talk to you. I don’t want things to be like this between us.’
‘Oh, I suppose you want us to be friends after your little threat before?’
Katya knew she was being unreasonable but he was so close and it had been two weeks and she’d missed him.
‘No, I don’t want to be your friend.’
‘Well, that won’t —’
‘Katya,’ Ben interrupted harshly, ‘please shut up. I have something to say and I’d really appreciate if you could just keep your shrewish tongue still until I’ve finished. Do you think you can do that?’ he demanded.
Katya blinked at his masterful tone. ‘Do you promise to leave as soon as it’s said?’
He sighed. ‘Yes.’ Ben figured she’d probably turf him out anyway.
‘OK, then.’ She drew her knees up and placed her hands protectively across her abdomen.
Now he had the opportunity, Ben wasn’t sure where to start. ‘I realized something big recently, after you’d gone. I realised that I loved you.’
She opened her mouth to speak and he held up his hand and shot her a warning look.
‘I was angry, too, of course. In fact, it’s been anger that has got me through this last two weeks. Because I realised that it was all one-sided. Because if you loved me, you wouldn’t have taken my baby away.’
Katya tried to interject again but again he hushed her.
‘It was like Bianca all over again. Loving someone who didn’t love me back. And that hurt and it brought back painful memories. But it’s worse this time around because I was so immature last time. I didn’t know the true meaning of love. I was selfish. Thinking that it was all about me and my feelings. You helped me see that it wasn’t some great conspiracy against me, that things like that happen in life sometimes. You showed me a mature form of love. A selfless love. By letting me seek solace in your body when I needed it so badly, even though you were a virgin, and by being willing to give up your baby because you didn’t think you’d be a fit mother.’
Katya’s hands trembled as his words sunk in. He loved her? Was it possible? Her heart thundered in her ears as she lay waiting for the but.
‘But...’
Yep. Here it came. Katya held her breath, waiting to hear how her running off and her behaviour tonight had totally destroyed his love.
‘Tonight I decided I wasn’t going to lie down and take it like I did with Bianca. I’ve decided I’m going to fight for it. I know you don’t love me back, that you may never love me, but I’m declaring my intention to woo you.’
‘But —’
Ben held up his hand again. ‘I know my whole lifestyle makes you uncomfortable and I’m sorry. I can’t change who I am. I know that because I spent a lot of years fighting it. And it was you who made me see that I could be the version of me that I wanted to be, not the one everyone expected. And this title allows me to do so much more good in this world. But I don’t need or care for any of its trappings. We’ll stay home every night and eat bruschetta from Taddeo’s if it means that you’ll grow to love me.’
‘Ben —’
He shook his head. ‘No. I haven’t finished yet. And if you never love me, at least I’ll know that I tried and that there’ll be honesty between us. Because if we’re going to raise this child separately, we’re going to need that.’
Tears build in Katya’s eyes and one rolled down her cheek. He had said the words she had never thought she’d hear from his mouth. ‘What about Bianca? Don’t you still love her?’
Ben rubbed his hands through his hair. ‘No. I’ve been hanging onto my bitterness not because I still love her but to protect myself from getting hurt again. I was a fool. You’re the one I love. You were right there in front of me and I didn’t realise it until you were gone. I’d been so used to emotional isolation I didn’t recognise that you’d brought me back into the fold.’
Beneath her hands, the baby moved giving Katya a couple of hefty kicks. She looked