Steinbeck come alive. His death was so tragic. I mean, cancer isn’t uncommon but colon cancer is so brutal and painful. So sad.”
“Yes.”
“How did Eleanor hear about you?”
“She had a friend who used our services. And apparently you mentioned Transitions to her once, so that was another mark in my favor. Thanks for that.”
One of the servers delivered a wooden bowl of sourdough bread to their table. Rachel instantly picked up a chunk and broke off a piece of crust to eat first.
She had always done that, Jess remembered. Jess had loved the inside and Rachel had loved the crusts. They had made the perfect pair.
“I don’t remember that conversation at all but if she says I did, I believe her. I’m glad she listened to me.”
“So am I,” Jess said. “It’s been a fun job so far.”
“What about men in your life? Anything new there?”
For some ridiculous reason, Nate’s image flashed into her brain. She frowned, annoyed with herself. “I’m taking a break right now from relationships. Work keeps me too busy to think about men much. Anyway, I’m never in one place long enough to form any serious connections.”
“That’s the way you like it, isn’t it?”
Rachel’s matter-of-fact tone held no condemnation but Jess instinctively wanted to protest anyway. How could she? Her sister was right. “Maybe. You know I’m not really on the happy-ever-after team.”
“Only because you’ve tried hard to convince yourself of that. Everyone deserves a happy ending.”
“Wouldn’t you agree that happy-ever-after has a different definition for everyone? Finding someone you love enough to share your life with is only the first step on the journey. Then you have to figure out how to live with them to be truly happy. It’s a marathon, not a sprint. Haven’t you found that with Cody?”
For an instant, Jess thought she saw sadness in her sister’s eyes but the server came with their salads and she couldn’t be sure.
What was going on? Was Rachel’s marriage in trouble? She had heard that having a child with special needs was one of the hardest challenges a couple could face together, that the divorce rate was higher than normal under those circumstances. Rachel and Cody had been in love since high school. She hated to think they might be struggling.
She wanted to ask but Rachel seemed determined to keep their conversation superficial, avoiding any of Jess’s efforts to push more deeply.
She finally gave up. If Rachel didn’t want to tell her, she couldn’t make her. Still, Jess couldn’t help but ache again for the close relationship they once had.
They opted to share dessert, a lemon cake so thick and luscious that Rachel had to pull out her phone and take pictures. Despite all the fuss, after she put away her phone, she only ate about two bites then set down her fork.
Fine. That just left more for Jess, she thought. When she had eaten as much as she could manage, she pushed away the cake and met her sister’s gaze. Over the flickering candlelight, she saw another hint of that despair she had glimpsed earlier.
She sighed. She couldn’t ignore it. This was Rachel. If she didn’t push, her sister would never tell her.
“Okay. You’ve put on a good front for the entire dinner. I commend your efforts. Now, why don’t you tell me the truth? What’s really going on? How’s Silas? You said today has been a hard day. Is it more than just today?”
She wasn’t sure Rachel would answer. The silence dragged on for an uncomfortable moment, broken only by muted conversation and the chink of cutlery on china from nearby tables as well as the murmur of the sea below them.
After a long moment, Rachel curled her hand around her water goblet stem so tightly, Jess worried it would break.
“I hate complaining. It makes me feel like such a horrible mother. But the past few months have been hard. Silas has become really out of control lately.”
“Out of control how?”
“Not napping. Not listening to anything I say. Not interacting with his sisters at all except to do exactly the things they don’t want him to do. It’s a lot to handle. My girls were both so sweet-natured at this age. Silas isn’t and I’m at my wit’s end, if you want the truth. There. Aren’t you sorry you asked?”
“No. You shouldn’t be carrying this by yourself. Have you talked to his pediatrician about it? Some of it might be his age.”
“Not really. This is all pretty new. Within the past few