madwoman.

I unclipped the car seat from the base and grabbed the diaper bag, lugging the entire load up Paula’s front steps.

Paula opened the door ensconced in a violet terry robe.

“Good morning!” I said, pushing my way past her and into the entrance to unburden my arms.

Paula let out a low whistle. “Look at you, girl! You are looking hot!”

“Thanks. It takes effort now, you know.”

Paula laughed. “Oh yeah! Hey, what’s up with your shoes?”

I glanced down at my loafers and shrugged. “They’re what fit.”

Paula tsked. “Oh no. Follow me.”

Paula retreated down the hallway. I looked at Laurie sound asleep in her car seat. I quickly put my hand on her and felt reassured by the rise and fall of her belly.

I walked down the hallway to Paula’s bedroom, stopping first to peek in on Danny. Paula had hand painted the room in baby blue with a mural of Thomas the Tank Engine on one wall. Sure looked a lot more inviting than Laurie’s nursery that doubled as Jim’s and my office.

I worried about having the computer in Laurie’s nursery. Was it giving off any weird energy waves that I should be concerned about?

Add that to my to-do list: look up safety of computers in nursery!

Currently, she was spending the night in our room in her portable bassinet, but soon she would outgrow that and have to sleep down the hall. My heart dropped. She would be down the hall! So far away from me.

A big kid in her crib in her own room.

I peered over at Danny asleep in his crib. I marveled at how long he appeared; it seemed like only yesterday he had been an infant like Laurie.

I touched his soft hair. “Hey, buddy, you’re gonna be a big brother soon.”

He was fidgeting a bit and his mouth started to move as though he wanted to nurse or have a pacifier. Still asleep, his hand shot to his mouth and he started sucking his thumb.

“You’re still a baby, too! I love you, little buddy.” I pulled his blanket up around him and headed toward Paula’s bedroom.

I found her digging in her closet.

“Size?” she asked.

“Pre-Laurie was seven.”

“So eight?” Paula asked from inside the closet.

“I guess. I’m still trying to come to terms with it.”

Paula laughed and rummaged deeper into the closet.

“I have some frozen breast milk for Laurie in the diaper bag. She could be hungry when she wakes up. I also brought some formula, just in case I’m not back in time for the feeding after that. Oh, shoot . . .”

“What?” Paula asked from inside the closet.

“I didn’t think about a purse. All my gear, my wallet, cell phone, notebook, and stuff is in the diaper bag.”

Paula emerged from the closet with the classiest pair of Ferragamo burgundy pumps I’d ever seen. They matched my blouse exactly. I gasped.

Paula grimaced. “Just my luck. I was a size eight pre-Danny, now I’m a nine, so you can have them.”

I grabbed her around the neck and kissed her cheek, then slipped into the shoes. They felt simply divine. “Ooh, I feel so in!”

She laughed as she kicked the loafers I’d been wearing across the room. “Well, those are definitely out.”

“I’m matchy-matchy now!” I exclaimed. “You are a lifesaver!”

Paula let out a self-satisfied sigh. “I know. And you don’t even know the half of it. I have the matching bag for you.”

She reached inside the closet and pulled out the purse. A lovely handbag that was large enough for my notebook, but sleek enough to belong to a media darling.

I sighed. “Paula! It’s beautiful.”

“You know my thing about bags and shoes.”

I studied my reflection in the mirror, posing with the shoes and holding the handbag to me. “I look like I can fake it, huh?”

Paula smiled widely. “Of course, girlfriend! Fake it ’til you make it.”

When I arrived at Gary Barramendi’s office, I was greeted by a receptionist, who had on a Dior suit and more expensive shoes than I did. Her honey-colored hair was pinned at the sides and down in the back, framing her round young face. She looked to be in her early twenties. She assured me she would let Gary know I had arrived and showed me to a waiting room.

The waiting room boasted huge windows with a glorious view of Alcatraz. There was a station with coffee, tea, and water in the corner of the room, and in the center were several high-back chairs near a table covered with magazines.

On the wall opposite the windows