happens to me, please let Laurie be okay.

A vision of Jim raising Laurie alone sent another shock wave through me. My stomach clenched violently.

Although the EMTs descended the three flights of steps smoothly, I still managed to feel guilty about my weight. My fat butt was causing them to move cautiously down the steps, probably delaying emergency treatment that could save Laurie’s and my life.

When they pushed the stretcher into the ambulance, I saw Laurie. She was nestled in a see-through plastic crib, much like the one she’d been in at the hospital only a few short weeks ago when she was born. The EMTs had wrapped her in the blanket I had used to shield myself when I nursed her and she seemed content.

I wanted desperately to hold her, but I was strapped down into mobile mode. The ambulance lurched forward. One of the EMTs remained in the back with us. He hovered over Laurie and smiled. “Her color looks good. Her heart rate is steady. I think she’s going to be fine.”

His comments settled my nerves a bit, but I still felt tears spilling out of my eyes. The ride to the hospital was short, and somehow the fact that the driver hadn’t put the sirens on did much to calm me.

We couldn’t be in such bad shape if they didn’t use the sirens, could we?

“Where’s Celia?” I asked.

“The other team went on ahead of us,” he said.

When we arrived at the hospital, Laurie was attended to first. A pediatrician conferred with one of the EMTs as they hovered over her crib. Jim suddenly appeared.

“Jim!” I practically screamed from the stretcher.

“Honey!” He rushed over to me and embraced me. “What happened? How are you feeling?”

“Terrible. My stomach is killing me. I got sick, but they’re still going to have my stomach pumped! Celia’s in critical condition. Helene was poisoned—”

“Shhh. Hold on, honey. I’m having a hard time following. Who is Celia?”

A nurse appeared at my side. “Mrs. Connolly, I’m going to take you in now.”

Jim looked panicked. “Wait, I—”

“Stay with Laurie, please!”

Jim nodded and looked solemn. Tears streamed down my cheeks.

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

Emergency

I was wheeled into another room. A team of doctors and nurses hovered over me. There were at least six people in the room with me.

A man dressed in scrubs stepped forward, “Mrs. Connolly, I’m Dr. Wong. As you know, we’re going to perform a gastric irrigation. You will experience minor discomfort. But the procedure is brief, after which you’ll be given activated charcoal to absorb any poison that might remain.”

Good God! Charcoal! They are going to give me charcoal!

Like briquettes?

I must have nodded because Dr. Wong said, “Good.”

“Wait, wait. My baby! Will she have to have charcoal? Irrigation?”

Dr. Wong blinked at me. “Dr. Monroe is attending to her now. Unless she starts to show severe symptoms, they’ll wait for our findings before they proceed with a treatment plan.”

Severe symptoms. What have I done!

A woman leaned over and touched my shoulder. “Kate, I’m Nancy. I’ll be assisting Dr. Wong. Try to relax and turn over onto your left side. We’ll be inserting this tube through your mouth, into the esophagus, and down to your stomach.”

Think happy thoughts. Beach thoughts. Don’t focus on the tube. I’m on the beach. The water is lapping against the sand. The air is refreshing. No. Not cold! Hot, it’s hot. I am on the beach in Hawaii. Don’t think about the tube.

The nurse sprayed a numbing agent into my mouth and down my throat. Even though it smelled like spearmint, it tasted like tin. She inserted the tube into my mouth and I experienced the most horrendous feeling as she shoved it down my throat. Like when a long noodle gets stuck in your throat and you don’t know if you need to swallow or try and hack it out.

My gag reflex kicked into high gear and I felt like I was somewhere between puking and suffocating.

This was worse than labor!

Nancy leaned in close. “You are doing great. Dr. Wong is starting the irrigation now. This will only take about ten minutes.”

Ten minutes! Oh God! I don’t have enough beach thoughts for ten minutes.

Think healthy thoughts. Healthy me. Healthy Laurie. Everyone healthy, fine, pink, happy. There. At least one minute must have gone by. Right? Only nine left.

Dr. Wong semigrunted.

What did that mean?

He watched the fluid leaving my stomach. I glanced down, causing myself to go cross-eyed and only glimpsed some rose-colored liquid. The tube was connected to a bag but I