with the shelf again, trying to figure out where it’s loose, but I’m not handy. I can cook, I can clean, but I’m not known for my skills with a hammer and a nail.
I turn away from the shelf, heading to the counter to text Gabe.
He’s my go-to guy, after all.
But I stop when I open his contact.
How will he be my go-to guy if we take the chance of dating? Or, more so, how will he be my go-to guy after?
Because, I gulp, remembering his words.
I had a good time tonight. What if we tried this again? This, and other things. We could go on a date.
He asked me to date. But he asked me to screw again too.
For all I know, that’s how he asked out Darla, and look where she is. She’s not hanging in the friend zone. She’s in the cold zone.
Fact is, I like the friend zone. The friend zone is safe. I don’t want to be unfriended, and that’s a distinct possibility if our dating goes haywire.
He only said he wants to do it again. He didn’t say he wanted to be mine. I didn’t speak my truth either, yet now as I look at last night in the clear light of day, I don’t think there was a reason to put myself on the line like that. To let him know I want much more than sex and dates.
There wasn’t, because he didn’t say he wanted to go all in.
He only wants to go all in with sex.
And I want it all.
That’s when I realize I’m in this way too deep.
The only way to save myself, to save the friendship, is to stay friends.
I find the hammer in my office and fix the shelf myself, but it’s still a little loose, and that leaves me with a tight, cold knot in my throat.
37
Gabe
Let the record reflect that I’m not happy that anyone suffered an asthma attack, was struck by a vehicle, or experienced a mild seizure.
I am thrilled none of the incidents resulted in serious injuries.
Selfishly, I’m also glad that all of them, as well as the brush fire on a hillside by the highway that we extinguished in twenty-five minutes, kept my mind off Arden.
There’s no room for thinking about women when you have to put out flames.
But now my shift is ticking near to closing time. As Shaw and I check the equipment on the truck, he gestures toward Charlie, who’s hanging out with us at the end of his shift. One of his last shifts. “Did you hear Charlie’s boss says he found a new guy already?”
“That so?”
Charlie affects a frown. “They don’t let the bodies get cold in our field.”
“He’s not starting for another week or so, but yeah, the boss man found someone from . . .” Shaw stops and scratches his head. “Hell, he told me when I saw him at the ER, and I already forgot.”
I’m tempted to make a wisecrack about his mind going to hell, like I usually do, but I’m not in the mood to joke.
Which is odd, since I usually am.
But I’m antsy, waiting to hear from Arden. As we wrap up the checklist, my phone dings with a text from her.
Arden: Working late. Doing inventory. Are you almost done?
Smiling, I figure she must want to see me ASAP.
It’s ten, and it’s been quiet for a spell. Plus, her store is only two blocks away. I clap Shaw on the back. “I’m going to see Arden for a few minutes. Call me if anything comes up, okay?”
His eyes widen in surprise. “A booty call? You dog.”
I roll my eyes. “Yes, exactly. I’m going to her store for a quickie in the stacks. No, you dickhead. But I did finally tell her how I felt.”
“About time. And what did the future Mrs. Harrison say?”
“That’s what I’m going to go and find out.” I rub my hands together, a burst of excitement zipping through me.
“Get the hell out of here, Casanova.”
A few minutes later, I knock on the door to A New Chapter. It’s dark inside. Only a few lights flicker. She walks to the door, looking as gorgeous as she did when I left her last night. Maybe more. She opens the door, and I half expect a kiss.
Wait.
I wholly expect a kiss.
Instead, she smiles faintly, the kind that doesn’t quite reach her eyes. “Thanks for coming.”
And no kiss is coming my way. Judging from her serious expression, I’m not getting the yes