her safety as long as I lived.
I might never have her in the way I want, but at least I can always make certain no one hurts her. She will forever be mine, even if she doesn’t know it.
Walking away from the body, I head to the sink and wash the blood from my hands. I spend way too long watching the reddened water swirl down the drain. When it finally runs clear, I scrub my hands with soap, rinse, and dry them. Pulling out my cell, I text Rob to tell him to get the cleanup crew together.
Most people would probably feel guilt or at least some type of emotion after doing what I just did, but I don’t feel anything.
Not that I can’t feel at all, because I can, I just chose not to. Feeling all the time would make it hard for me to kill people for the mob, on top of protecting Dove.
My phone chimes and I see Rob’s name flash across the screen, letting me know that he’s gotten my message. When he arrives, I walk out to my car like nothing ever happened. I consider just driving home, but at the last second turn onto the street to Dove’s place.
She lives in a relatively safe area, but that didn’t stop me from putting cameras and motion sensors in her house. I would go to any length to ensure her complete safety. Even in the safest neighborhood in the country, no one knows what happens behind closed doors.
Parking on the street a few houses down, I shut the car off, and look up at the apartment building. How much longer can I do this?
Subject myself to her sweet scent, soft murmurs, and beautiful face. How much longer can I go on before I’m forced to claim her? My need for her is starting to consume me, eating away at every single rational thought that I have. Every day I’m forced to tamp it down, but I’m not a saint, and soon enough, I’ll break.
Forcing the thoughts away before they take root, I exit the car and walk across the street at a leisurely pace. It’s quiet, and if you look hard enough, you might see a few stars hanging in the night sky. When I reach the door to the apartment building, I slide my keycard into the door, waiting for the click to push it open. No one even glances my way as I walk inside. I’ve been here so many times most people probably think I live here.
In fact, I know one of Dove’s neighbors actually thinks I do. Of course, I don’t correct her. What would be the fun in that? I use the walk upstairs to clear my mind, and by the time I reach Dove’s door, I’m a little more composed. Pulling out my phone, I check the surveillance feed in her bedroom one last time. The image confirms that she’s sound asleep, tucked nicely into her bed. Unlocking her door, I enter her apartment slowly. I’ve done this so many times it’s like riding a bike to me.
Quietly, I close the door behind me. I’m welcomed by the darkness of the apartment, feeling at home in more than one way. The dark is where I thrive and the shadows my best friend. It’s the only place I can be myself. But Dove, she is light, pure, vibrant, and innocent. My darkness threatens to taint that light, to snuff it out... and that reminder alone keeps me away, but never too far.
I’ve only taken one small step inside, but Max is right there, curling his fury body around my leg, purring loud enough to wake the dead. He, too, thinks I live here. Bending down, I pat the top of his head before shushing him away.
The soles of my shoes make little noise as I move through the house like a ghost. I know where every corner, every creak, and every piece of furniture is. I know about every window and every door, and even what’s hidden in each cupboard. I know how she likes her coffee, what her favorite books are, and what time she gets up every morning.
There isn’t one thing about Dove that I don’t know about. I know her inside and out, maybe even better than I know myself.
Standing just outside her half-open door, I clench my jaw. Her sweet scent of vanilla and sugar surrounds me. The scent stirs a deep primal need within me.