I whisper to him, but he doesn’t listen to me and just walks into the other room.
“Should I go with them?” Jeff asks, and Sylvia just shakes her head.
“I don’t think that is necessary.” She looks at me, then at Jeff. “Also, all communication between Carter and Erin will have to go through me. In fact, I don’t think there is any need for him to contact her. If he needs anything, I will have all the answers.”
Jeff nods at her and then pushes away from the table, walking past me and stopping. “They say you hurt the ones you love the most.” I don’t answer him. I just get up and walk away from the table, the whole time breathing slowly, so the tears don’t escape. The more I walk away, the more my heart hurts, and it’s knowing that I won’t be with him that makes it beat faster in my chest. The pain shoots through me, but I don’t stop moving. I grab my purse and make my way to my car and pull away from the stage, the pain deeper and deeper. I push it down. I push it all the way down, and instead of going to the office, I go back to my father’s house.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Carter
I’m not surprised when Jeff calls me on Sunday and tells me that we are summoned for a meeting. The weekend was a blur, and when the car picks me up on Monday morning, I look at the seven empty bottles of Jack on the counter. The only time it was easy to breathe was when I drank. Her face is clear in my head when I’m not drinking, making it hard to move, hard to think, hard to live. I get in the car, putting my glasses on. “Can we stop and get something to eat?” I tell him, laying my head back on the seat. He pulls up at Sonic, and I order the double egg and cheese, the grease soaking up some of the booze from my system. When I walk on set, I go straight to my trailer, but I don’t know why I expect her to be there sitting at the table with a smile on her face.
It’s even worse knowing that she is somewhere on the lot, and I can’t see her. I sit in my trailer until I hear a knock on the door, and my heart speeds up just a touch, thinking, hoping, but then the door opens, and I see it’s just Jeff. “You ready?” he asks me, taking off his glasses and tucking them into his suit pocket.
“As ready as I’ll ever be,” I say and walk out of the trailer, following him. My eyes roam everywhere to see if I can see her, to see if she is around here. We get to the table first, and I sit down at the far end, grabbing my phone and going through it. Nothing has been posted on Instagram since Friday night. I hear the noise of high heels coming closer, and my hands start to shake, my heart beating faster and faster. I look up for a second, and I see her. Her hair tied back in a ponytail, she’s wearing all black, and her head is down. I don’t stare more than that because I don’t think I can take it. The pain is so much more than it was yesterday. “I need a drink,” I say under my breath and then hear Jeff hiss.
“The last thing you need is a drink. You stink like the bottom of a fucking barrel.” I look at him, and then he turns to say hello to everyone. I watch Sylvia sit in front of me, followed by Ryan, who looks like he’s about to chew me a new asshole. He just glares at me, and then I look at Erin. Her eyes are sunken in, and she looks frail. She must have lost weight. I wonder if she’s still sick from Saturday. I want to ask her, to make sure she is okay, but I don’t. I sit in my chair and let the pain eat away at me.
“So there has been a change in plans,” Sylvia starts off, and I feel Jeff look at me, then back at Sylvia. “From now on, I will be the one working Carter’s case,” she says. I turn to look at Erin. I didn’t think she would actually come back and work with me,