feeling so alone. I knew this because at the end of every time we spent together, she would tell me that she considered that time as a gift. She also confessed to wishing that it would never be over, despite me secretly wishing the opposite. Because I needed to get back to Lucius and with each passing hour, it was getting harder and harder to face the doubt. To face the worry of all those ‘what ifs’ as the not knowing was the worst part about it all. And even in my sleep there was no rest for my mind, as I would just dream of him, waking to the sounds of his promises from the past. A vow he had made me when I had first run from him,
‘Now, you listen to me, my girl, and you listen well, you and I will never be done, we will never be over, which means I will NEVER stop looking for you. I will fucking hunt you down to the ends of the Earth and beyond… so unless you want a hard time running, then I suggest you keep your ass there and be ready for me because… I. Am. Coming. For. You!’ he had snarled dangerously, and I’d had no other option but to digest his words and close my eyes against the sound of his threatening promise. Because that was what it had been and right now, even in my dreams I allowed my mind to take me back there. Back to this promise so I could hold on to it like comfort blanket.
But at the time my reply to this was,
‘Then to the ends of the Earth is where it will be…’
And the ends of the Earth was where we now found ourselves. Because we were realms apart, no longer just countries between us as it turned out to be for months. So yes, my mind clung to this vow for a reason and it was one that admittedly my heart would hold him to.
Hold him to it until the end of my time living it.
Which meant that despite putting on a brave face every time I woke, my mind had spent the minutes of the day hanging on to my dreams of him and his promise. Of course, it helped when I would then get to spend my time talking to Vena, who wanted to know everything about my world. And I mean everything, as one conversation had led into another and another and before long there was little left for me to actually speak of.
She had wanted to know all about my family and my upbringing which, admittedly, compared to hers, I now felt bad complaining about. Even as I told her of the constraints set against me due to being being human, because when hearing of her own troubles, compared to her I had absolutely nothing to complain about.
This was because it seemed like every fun thing that they actually did here she wasn't allowed to do or ever included in for fear of causing her mother embarrassment. I found this a heart breaking admission, as all she ever did in her eyes was let her mother down. In fact, it seemed as if the only person who gave her any love at all was her brother, someone it became very clear she loved very dearly. I was actually starting to think that he was the only person in her entire life to have ever given her a compliment and even she admitted that as nice as they were to hear she always knew they were coming from a biased person.
That she could never fully trust them to be true.
I had to say I was utterly astounded by this, because to me she was a true beauty, inside and out! But then she had never heard a compliment come from another man before and even admitted to me that she wouldn't have known what to do if it ever happened.
I had first blurted out,
“Gods, are all the men blind here!?” This had made her blush and play with her fingers in her lap nervously which seemed to be a habit of hers. Then I had told her, that when it happens, as I had no doubt that it would, the very first thing she should do is trust it, for it was true. Her beautiful and unusual big eyes had widened at this before those freckles of hers had deepened to a darker pink. Gods,