the very things she thought were important heartened her. He’d asked for this meeting to drill down into her chef-pestering. Her suspicion was that he was many things – most of them bad – but there was a chance that, in his repulsive, dysfunctional way, he might be a genius.
‘Ed, no! I’d have to shave my legs. And maybe put on fake tan.’
‘What? Why?’
‘For Liam to see me without my clothes on … I would die.’
‘But didn’t Peggy say you’ve to start being kind to your body?’
‘Yes, but …’
… It was almost three weeks since she’d seen Peggy. In a few more weeks, she’d be able to tell Ed.
‘How about you tell Liam you’re nervous?’ Ed suggested.
‘I don’t think he’d care.’
‘He’ll be dealing with all kinds of people, if he ever qualifies. This’ll be a good opportunity for him. And for you.’
She could not bear to be massaged by Liam. He was not a good man. She wasn’t quite sure when she’d arrived at that decision but she felt it intensely.
He was a bit of a lech – in Tuscany he’d been ogling Robyn non-stop.
She didn’t think he was a kind person. She sometimes wondered if Nell was too young and too dazzled by him.
But if she kept resisting this massage suggestion, there was a chance that Ed might do something like ring Peggy to get her to intercede. And that would be a disaster.
‘Okay,’ she said. ‘I’ll do it.’
‘Cara says you can massage her,’ Nell said.
Liam winced. ‘No. I can’t deal, not with her.’
‘Why not?’
‘Super-judgy person.’
‘She’s totally not. She’s so sweet.’ It was a huge effort to get herself under control. ‘When you qualify you’ll have to work with people you don’t love. All part of your training.’
‘I’ll only work with people I like.’ He noticed her sceptical look. ‘What? I’m good at this, Nell. I’ll be able to pick and choose my clients.’
This was like being in a bad dream, trapped with Liam until he passed his fucking exams.
Thanks to him, she’d lived rent-free for a year. Fairness said she should shoulder the financial burden for the next couple of months. A tougher person would have just walked away. They’d have told him he was a fool for jacking in his job and leaving himself with no income. But that wasn’t who she was.
As soon as he was earning again, she could leave, so the only thing she could do was round up plenty of bodies for his massage practice. Which was a lot more difficult than she’d expected. His nearest and dearest weren’t exactly knocking the door down. And she literally couldn’t bear him to touch her.
Her obsession with Ferdia was still eating away at her. If they were insane enough to start anything, who knew what chaos it would kick off? Horrible visions bothered her, of him crashing out of his degree, both of them living in penury, hated by all the Caseys, then eventually by each other.
She’d probably see him on Friday of next week for Johnny’s birthday. It would be absolute torture.
FOUR DAYS AGO
* * *
MONDAY, 5 OCTOBER
NINETY-THREE
Liam’s massage table was in Violet’s bedroom.
‘Sit down.’ Liam waved Cara towards the pink rocking chair. ‘Just need a few details here. You on medication? Injuries I need to be aware of? Any other pertinent info?’
‘No medication. No injuries. But I’m …’ she coughed ‘… out of my comfort zone.’
‘This is a professional environment, Cara. Think of me the way you’d think of a doctor.’
That didn’t help: she was also embarrassed whenever she revealed herself to a doctor.
Liam stepped from the room, leaving her to undress. She clambered onto the table, tugging at the towel, desperate to cover as much of herself as possible.
Lifting her face from the headrest, she bleated miserably, ‘I’m ready.’ Then she replaced her face and admired Violet’s carpet.
In he came, whisking the towel down to her waist, carelessly splashing oil across her back. Some drops ricocheted into her hair, which she had only just washed. His cold hands landed on her skin, making her entire body pop with goosebumps. Immediately he was kneading and knuckling as if he were a washerwoman by a brook, laundering a badly soiled bedsheet.
He was energetic, she’d say that.
Soon her skin felt as if it had been scorched with a lighter. He appeared to have landed on a particularly stubborn stain on her right shoulder. Jabbing both of his thumbs deep into the tissue, it felt instantly bruised. His knuckles dragged back over the same area and