boyfriend now.
We had an arrangement where I fucked him on command to keep my parents out of trouble.
I didn’t have the right to be upset, and so, I put on a brave face and acted as if everything was fine. It had taken a lot of convincing on my part to make Vicky play along with my charade. In the end, I had to remind her of how many times I’ve been humiliated at the hands of this man. I wasn’t going to let him do it again tonight in front of California’s elite. So, we had sat at the bar and pretended like we were at Mercury’s without a care in the world. It was going fine until Damien showed up.
“We were just talking and having a few drinks.” I raised a brow. “It’s not like I had my arms around either one of them whispering in their ear.”
He stood there with his hands in his pockets saying nothing and the silence made my insides crawl. He wasn’t going to explain what he was doing with her, and he wasn’t going to apologize for it.
And I was done being a fool.
My childhood self was done with wanting her childhood nemesis to like her. My grownup self was done with wanting to matter to this man after all these years.
I was just done.
I gave a curious glance around his apartment “So, where do you want me?”
The look on his face had my heart ready to beat out of my chest. “What do you mean, where do I want you?”
I uncrossed my arms and gestured outwardly around. “Where do you want to fuck me? The couch? Kitchen? Shower?” As I was looking around, I noticed his living room led out onto a balcony. “How about the balcony?” I suggested. “We can give your neighbors a show.”
He was in front of me, snatching my arm up, before I could finish with my suggestions. The tick in his jaw was so prominent, I wouldn’t be surprised if he cracked a molar. “Did those guys get you so turned on you’re willing to let me fuck you out on the balcony in front of the entire goddamn city?”
I tried to master the art of being cold. I wanted to be disconnected and hard. But the illusion was shattered as the tears pushed their way out of my eyes and down my face. I wasn’t going to back down though, despite the tears. “Of course, not,” I snapped. “I’m willing to let you fuck me anywhere there’s a surface because that’s how a whore’s supposed to cater to whoever’s paying her, right? And, Damien, I’m no longer confused, in the least, about me being your whore. Only the payment is my parents’ freedom instead of cold, hard cash.”
Damien let go of my arm and stepped back from me as if he had been burned. His chest was heaving and the look on his face was pure fury. It was beautiful and frightening.
He was beautiful and frightening.
He regarded me for a few minutes before he spoke, his voice was low and lethal, “Is that how my touch makes you feel? When I’m buried balls deep inside you, is that what you’re thinking?”
No! I wanted to confess that I felt desired when he was inside me. I felt wanted and needed and sometimes, maybe, loved. But he’s gotten enough laughs at my expense over the years. I wasn’t about to tell him how I really felt whenever he touched me.
“I understand that it was better for business to introduce me as your date or girlfriend rather than your whore.” I shrugged a shoulder as if the realization made me feel nothing. “But either I’m just a whore and available to those guys at the bar, or I’m your girlfriend making you unavailable to the blonde.”
“Goddamn it, Fion-”
I held my hand out to stop him. “I get confused in my role when you try to have it both ways, Damien. I can handle the whore part of this deal, but I’m done with the somewhat girlfriend part of it. You can fuck me in private until the six months are up, but you’ll have to pick someone else to be your girlfriend in public. I won’t do it any longer.”
Each word out of my mouth felt like a razor blade across my skin. Vicky had been right all along. I’d always felt something for Damien and it wasn’t always hate. He singled me out, and I convinced myself