broken within the court.’
But now she was by his side. His.
Suyin finally ceased struggling and he lowered her on to the mattress of rugs and furs, laying himself alongside her. The discussion about Gao had stolen away her poise.
She lay stiff in his arms. ‘I escaped from Gao’s grasp long ago. He hoped to use me when I became the Emperor’s favourite. But I freed myself. I found a protector more powerful than Gao. I escaped.’
And now, years later, Gao wanted her dead. Anger flowed hot through his veins. Suyin was wrong. His reasons could be very personal.
‘Gao won’t ever come near you again,’ he vowed.
‘He uses others to achieve his goals. He never acts himself.’ Her voice sounded drained, listless. She blinked up, focusing on nothing in particular. ‘It’s madness to go to Shen, but it’s madness not to. I’m not certain this was the right path.’
‘I don’t know either,’ he said after a pause.
The men who served him were loyal, steadfast and followed orders impeccably. Suyin was the only person who ever questioned him without fear. She had made him realise that there was no way to win if he stayed in the south, barricaded in a defensive position. He’d defeat Gao’s first wave, only to be attacked by imperial forces as well as the other warlords who would swoop in like vultures for their share of the kill.
Gao was too powerful. Li Tao needed to do something unexpected to challenge him.
Suyin turned in his hold to nestle against his shoulder, and he pushed the thoughts of war to the corners of his mind. He fought these battles in his head all day and in his dreams. These moments of peace were his only luxury.
‘Tao, what made you change your mind?’
‘Isn’t it clear?’ His hand trailed a soothing path along her spine.
‘No,’ she whispered mournfully. ‘No, it’s never clear with you.’
He didn’t know what else she demanded. He shifted and took her face in his hands, kissing her with his lips pressed earnestly to hers.
She broke away. ‘You’ll never say the words.’
His muscles wound tight, as if he was readying himself for impending battle. He didn’t have an answer for her.
He kissed her again with a growing urgency, tasting her as she opened herself to him. He’d make love to her if he could. They could lose themselves in each other. The roughness of the bed would fade quickly.
But the warmth didn’t quicken into passion as it always did between them. Gradually Suyin sank against him, too exhausted to stay awake. He was weary as well. The day had been full of changes. Instead of removing her clothes, he brushed back her hair and pressed his lips to her forehead. Her breathing had grown heavy and he imagined she was already asleep.
Chapter Sixteen
The city of Chengdu stood on the bank of the Jin River, which divided the southern province from the central empire. A sturdy wall of grey brick and mortar enclosed the provincial capital. Within the gates, the streets were paved and rows of buildings lined either side of the crowded avenues.
It had been a long time since Suyin had been around so much activity. The babble of the crowd left her dizzy and disoriented. The military installations had increased as they travelled closer, yet the citizens of Chengdu wandered through the markets buying and bartering as usual.
Li Tao handed the reins to one of the bodyguards and they continued through the streets on foot. ‘Wang told me you barely ate last night.’
Wang, the head guardsman, had been tasked with taking vigilant care of her
‘All I wanted to do was sleep,’ Suyin said.
‘I forget that you’re not accustomed to such travel.’
‘I am not helpless.’
The reply came out more abruptly than she intended. She wasn’t helpless, but she was weary. Suyin wasn’t used to riding on horseback the entire day. She wasn’t used to riding at all. At night, they slept at roadside inns or in tents that were hastily erected at sundown. The gruelling routine drained the last of her strength. The continued uncertainty drained the last of her patience.
Li Tao directed the party towards the busiest thoroughfare to search for a tavern. He ignored her protests and insisted on a proper meal before heading to the river crossing. Soon they would be in imperial territory, outside his jurisdiction.
‘I didn’t expect to be so tired,’ she said, her tone conciliatory.
‘You’ll feel better after eating.’
She took his arm and he surprised her by resting his hand against the