Tao waited for the lone figure to disappear into the green. It was a mistake to let him go. Ru Shan was a young man pining for the love of a complicated woman. He was also a fighter and a soldier, dangerous in his exuberance.
People like Lady Ling were incapable of love. They were both alike in that way. The imperial palace was as cutthroat as the winding streets of Luoyang. She would never allow anyone to possess her just as he answered to no master. There were no illusions between them. Perhaps that was the lure. Desire without emotion, cold and clean.
When she met his eyes, it was always with challenge. She understood the tooth-and-claw struggle for survival deep within her bones. Desire meant nothing in the face of that struggle, except for a few stolen moments.
They could forget for one night. Perhaps her passion was feigned, another ploy. He didn’t care. That night he’d take his fill of her. Suyin’s lure would fade when she no longer danced like smoke in his head, when she became flesh and blood and silken skin beneath him. Then he’d send her away as she so desperately wanted. Let her face Gao on her own. She was more than capable.
Suyin could take whatever secrets she held with her. He didn’t need them and didn’t need her for anything more than what she could give him that night.
Chapter Eight
Suyin stepped into the garden, fighting to steady herself after the intensity of the confrontation with Li Tao. The soldiers remained hovering at the passages, but the warlord was gone. She could tell from the silence of the house and the listless way the servants milled about the edges of the courtyard. There was always an inexplicable sense of emptiness when he wasn’t there.
‘Go,’ she urged gently. ‘Continue with your duties as usual.’
The servants responded to her as if she were the mistress of the house. One by one, they moved away. She knew they would gather in a distant corner to mull and gossip. Jun and Cook were the last to leave. The boy held a brown-feathered chicken by its feet as he trudged towards the kitchen. She managed a weak smile for him before he departed.
Auntie came to her. ‘Master Li has taken Ru Shan! In his anger, he might…’ She swiped at her nose with a handkerchief, her eyes red and swollen.
‘None of you will suffer for this. I swear it.’
Auntie was intent on fretting. ‘But Tao—Master Li will not tolerate disloyalty.’
‘The Governor knows this is my doing,’ Suyin replied, sounding more confident than she felt. It was clear that she had no control over him, or herself, when they were alone.
Li Tao was foremost a warlord and warrior. A man of discipline. He wanted complete control of everything, even over what would pass between them that night. Especially over that.
She shouldn’t have pulled Auntie into her schemes. Not when she knew how ruthless Li Tao was. He had the entire household cowering under his fury. Then he had kissed her and tormented her until she was clinging to him. She folded her arms tight around herself. Every part of her felt swollen, awakened and raw with sensation.
One night was all he wanted from her in the end. She should be relieved. When the lust and physical need were cold and done, he would have no reason to keep her. Madame had taught her that.
A strand of hair fell over her eyes and she pushed it back. No wonder they all stared at her so fearfully in her disarray. The sun was starting to sink in the sky. She didn’t have much time left before dark.
She let Auntie take her arm and lead her back up to her room as if she were a doll. The stairs seemed to stretch on endlessly. Her feet fell heavily on each step. The surge of emotion had left her drained.
They returned together to her quarters. Suyin sank into a chair in the sitting room and began working her hair loose from its knot. Auntie rushed to help her, pulling the pins to lower her hair with a gentle, careful hand. The tenderness of it made her throat tighten. Of all of them, she would miss Auntie the most once she was gone, but she couldn’t stay. She had to think of survival. That was her one true talent. Her ability to bend men to her will was only a myth.
‘My lady must know Master Li