to use later. Nothing I talk about is safe from scrutiny.”
“Not a good side effect of the job,” the Mistress agreed amiably. “How about this? Whatever we talk about now, I will try my hardest not to bring it up in future chats unless you specifically mention it first.”
God, the woman was tenacious. Too exhausted, mentally and physically, to continue fighting with someone who had the strength and stamina to tangle her up in emotional knots. “Whatever, fine. Get it over with.”
“Pinky swear?” Playfully, Connie offered her little finger, slightly curved.
“I don’t know what that is, but...” Bodie mirrored the gesture, nonplussed when the Mistress hooked them together firmly but briefly. “O-kay, then. If that’s what makes you happy, I guess.”
Connie shuffled and made herself comfortable on the couch, keeping Bodie’s hand in hers. “Talking makes me happy. I’m a simple soul really—all I need in life is to please people and have a sub who craves attention. How about you, Bodie? What does happiness mean for you?”
Braun. He personified everything that made her feel giddy and excited. When he smiled at her, her world brightened, elevating from the gloom of her existence. When he told her he was proud of her, that she was his clever girl, something dead inside her came back to life for a few moments.
Bodie said that to Connie, feeling like a moron, but her new tentative friend smiled knowingly.
“That’s lovely, sweetheart. Do you think that will change if you tell him you’re a—”
“Can we please stop using that word? It doesn’t define me. I don’t want everyone to know me as the dumb virgin who attached herself to the first guy to show her any affection. That’s a cliché, right?”
“Isn’t Liam the first man to love you?”
“Liam?” Honestly shocked by the question, Bodie stared at Connie. “Well sure, I suppose. He’s been my best friend forever, since we were kids. But he doesn’t think of me that way. I’m his annoying pseudo kid sister. There’s nothing...romantic between us. And he’s never indicated any interest in me.”
She must be mistaken, thinking she heard the woman whisper, “Not that you paid attention to.”
“In high school, he was all about the guys. For every crush he had on a girl, he had one for two guys as well. I never showed up on his radar, not that it would’ve made a difference to this situation.”
“Have you spoken to him about this?”
“God, no. He'd be busy setting me up with everyone and anyone he could find to rectify the issue. If my parents find out I’m...inexperienced, my life as it is would crash and burn in a fiery level of hell. To them, I’ll be a valuable commodity. My father would probably rape me for the shits and giggles, just so he could brag about bagging a virgin. If my mother could stop him, they’d auction me off to the highest bidders. They like money and an orgy of men paying for a woman’s virginity would really bring in the cash.”
The Mistress became unnaturally still. The air hummed dangerously with silent tension. “I’m sorry, your parents would what?”
“Oh, too much information. Sorry, I’m not used to this talking thing. Just forget that, it doesn’t matter.” Flushing violently, she tried to pull free the hand still in Connie’s grasp.
“I don’t think we will. Explain that. Your blood parents would sell you for sex if your father didn’t take a fancy to you first? What kind of family do you come from?”
Bodie huffed. “Not a pleasant or forgiving one. I’m the black sheep because I haven’t shirked the law and become one of them. I should’ve done; maybe they’d leave me alone if I was one of them. They’d still blame me for Alicia’s accident, but I’d be one of them.”
“Aren’t you just a fascinating rabbit warren of turmoil? I don’t know anything about this accident or your family, Bodie, but my guess is if they treat you like shit now, being one of them wouldn’t change anything but you. Would you really want to be someone capable of selling a woman’s virginity against her wishes, knowing she’d be raped? Could you sacrifice another, just to fit in with monsters?”
Bodie didn’t need to search her soul down to the nooks and crannies to find the answer to Connie’s questions. She’d grown up with those monsters, watched her parents turn her sister into one after the accident that changed both Alicia’s future and her own. She’d seen the devastation of what