clean.
Now it was not.
The first thing I noticed was a box wrapped in birthday paper sitting on his coffee table. That by itself wasn’t noteworthy, but the Care Bear wrapping paper looked old and tattered. Totally out of place. Alone, it would have been strange, but couple that with the photographs strewn around the box and it was seriously strange.
Next, I took in what looked like legal documents if the blueback and fourteen-inch paper was any indication. Not a few bound files but a lot of them. Some thicker than others. There was also more loose-leaf paper scattered on the floor.
“Brady?” I muttered.
“Fuck!” Brady roared.
I forced myself to stay calm even though the atmosphere in the room had gone from not so good to electric.
For once in my life, I was at a loss. I had no idea what to say or what to do. I heard Brady moving behind me, I felt him come to a stop beside me, but I couldn’t stop looking at the Care Bear wrapping paper.
“You shouldn’t have come here,” he spat.
Yes, he spat out the words like they tasted bad and he sounded like he meant each one of them.
Still, I ignored the warning bells.
I shouldn’t have done that, either.
“What’s going on?”
“None of your fucking business.”
My head whipped to the side—my soaking wet hair whipped with it—fully prepared to tell him exactly what I thought about him being a royal asshole.
But my words died a quick death when I took in his stone-cold face.
His tone was angry but his features were awash with sadness. So much leaking out of him it hurt to look at him.
“Honey—”
“Turn around and get the fuck out of my house.”
Jesus, that hurt.
This was not my Brady.
Ugliness—that was what was pouring out. He’d said he had it inside of him. He’d made me promise not to let him break me.
For a week, I’d been happy. For a week, he’d shown me that we’d been worth the wait. But now, he’d taken himself away from me.
I drew in a breath and hesitantly asked, “Who’s in the pictures?”
I started to step toward the table but stopped when he declared, “None of your business.”
“Brady.”
“Don’t do this to us,” he whispered, and I swear to God, it hurt to hear his tortured whisper.
Quiet pain that was so loud it scored through me.
My heart started burning.
“Please tell me what’s going on.”
“Go home.”
“Please—”
“Jesus fuck, woman!” he exploded and I took a step back. “Clue the fuck in. I don’t want you here. I’ll give you a lot but you do not get this. You do not get Nicole. Especially not today.”
Nicole?
I gazed into Brady’s eyes but there was nothing there, not even the cloudy gray I’d seen for years. Not the sadness I was well-acquainted with. Blank. Empty. Bottomless. Nothing.
That killed.
That hurt worse than his refusal to talk to me, worse than him telling me to leave.
Brady Hewitt was undone.
Checked out.
And the hell of it was, he didn’t want to check back in.
He didn’t trust me to help him get him through whatever this was.
I stood there looking at the man I loved and wondered if he ever would.
Without a word, I headed to the front door.
He said nothing.
My hand went to the knob and I took my time opening the door, giving him time to stop me.
He said nothing.
I opened the door to the howling wind and sideways rain.
He said nothing.
So I did the only thing I could do. I slammed the door behind me and rushed to my car. I didn’t feel a single drop of rain, I didn’t feel the wind against my clammy skin. I didn’t feel a damn thing as I drove down his street. I was too busy wondering if in my determination to get what I wanted if I’d taken into account what was good for me.
In the five minutes I was in Brady’s house, the storm had gotten worse. My vision blurred, tears fell, and my heart burned.
I could handle anything but that.
I would guide Brady to happiness but I couldn’t force it on him.
With tears in my eyes, my heart breaking, that horrible scene on repeat, and the unknown Nicole—a woman Brady obviously loved very much—on my mind, I had no business driving down flooded streets.
You do not get Nicole.
Who the hell was Nicole?
18
A crack of lightning.
I stared at the box, unseeing.
A violent rumble of thunder.
I blinked and looked around.
Hadley was gone.
The sound of the storm raging outside penetrated my haze.
Jesus fuck, what had I done?
I’d sent