With us.”
It has everything to do with it.
But I can’t say that out loud. He doesn’t understand, and he never will. He can never be allowed to.
I reach up and rake my fingertips through his beard gently. “When we’re together, I don’t think about it. Alameda has always been my escape from that world. But you’re…well, you’ve become more than an escape.”
So much more…
In the deepest recesses of my soul, I know that falling for Maximus will be my ruin. Nothing good can come from these moments together except the bliss I feel under his touch. The solace of his companionship.
This bliss.
This solace.
This complete heaven, banishing the hell for which I’ve been groomed. The fate for which I was conceived.
“What am I, then?”
With him, I feel like I’m more.
And even if it’s not forever…I’ll take it.
I bite my lip and fiddle with his cuff link absently. “Lately I’m beginning to think that being with you is where I’m supposed to be. At least right now.” A minute. An hour. However long we have. “And I can’t stay away.”
At first, Maximus does nothing. Then without a single word, he joins our hands and turns his body to mine. “My life has always been about restraint. I can’t remember a time when it wasn’t. And when it comes to you…” He winces slightly. “Honestly, I’ve never felt so powerless. The minute you walk into the room, restraint isn’t a word I even understand anymore.”
I draw my hand up his chest, enjoying the feel of his heartbeat. “You can let go with me.”
When he draws me against him, I’m grateful that we’re done with words. The sweet and slow melding of our mouths is forgiveness and reassurance. Acceptance of this growing connection between us. Defiance against whatever or whoever threatens it. More, it’s a heart-swelling reminder of how right it feels to surrender to the moment with him.
With an effortless sweep, he lifts me onto the deep windowsill, shoving a stack of books away to give us more room. One of them falls onto the floor with a thud, but his hands don’t stop. He strokes his fingers over every bare inch of my skin until he’s skating his incredible touch up my arms. Then inwardly, so exquisitely and slowly, over the silky panels that cover my breasts. Then lower again, palming his way along my thighs, thanks to the high slits of the gown. He leans in, pressing my legs wide to accommodate him.
I sigh. I soften. I surrender.
For all the twisting and aching my heart’s done tonight, the thing feels like a balloon in my chest now, taking up space I need to breathe. He nips at my jaw, kissing and caressing his way to my shoulder, where he’s shifted the fabric to kiss the flesh underneath. I cover his hand with mine, coaxing the panel free. Then the other. I’m bared to him, and it feels so good.
He doesn’t move, barely breathes. Seconds bleed away with only his eyes passing over me in silent worship. “You’re the most gorgeous creature I’ve ever laid eyes on.”
My skin tightens at his words, but I ache for more. I’m dizzy to have this man’s hands on me. His mouth. Anything that will feed or ease this frenzy that’s taken hold of me.
“Touch me,” I beg softly.
He gifts me with the barest touch, dragging his thumb along the outer curve of my breast, circling in slowly. I’m ready to beg him again when he dips his head and sucks my nipple into his mouth, lashing the tip with his tongue.
I suck in a sharp breath. “Oh!”
His low rumble is filled with matching lust as I tangle my fingers in his hair. My desire unleashes more of his own, and he dips back in to lavish the same tantalizing treatment to my other breast. He nips and sucks and licks, tempting the balloon in my chest to nearly burst.
Never mind that the pulse between my thighs is shredding all my reasons to stop. I tighten around his waist, instinct driving me to create more friction there. A little voice in my head tells me that this is all too much, too fast—but a louder voice is screaming it’s not fast enough. The danger is quickly swallowed up by the lust that’s burning through me. The flames are consuming, and I don’t care.
I don’t want to stop. I never want to stop.
He lifts his head to take my mouth in another kiss. This one is more