couples do. It already happened once, in college. I was at a frat party making out with a guy, and when his cold hand touched my stomach, I began to scream, and begged him to leave me alone.
That’s the only time I ever allowed anyone to touch me like that. My dates before Wes were just friendly meetings where I pretended to be interested, but I always ended up going home, grabbing my phone, and calling my best friend Wes instead.
“What are you thinking?” He places a strand of hair behind my ear. “You suddenly went quiet, but you look a little flushed.”
“You’re amazing,” I say, squeezing his hand. “I’m lucky to have you.”
“We’re lucky to have each other,” he offers, tracing his finger up and down my arm.
I shiver, and suddenly I want just a little more. Maybe a taste of what we can have because with him I feel incredibly safe. Safer than I’ve ever felt in my entire life. If we do this slowly, I might be able to conquer the power they’ve exercised over me all these years. With Wes, I might be able to take control of myself, my body, and my reactions to others.
“We can have dessert on the terrace,” I offer. “Why don’t we order Sterling’s chocolate cake and go home.”
He takes out a small box and hands it to me.
“You’re spoiling me, Wes,” I gasp when I unwrap a purple heart shaped pendant surrounded by a halo of diamonds. “It’s beautiful.”
“It’s to remind you that I’m always with you. A promise that I’ll never leave you.”
My heart grows inside my chest. He’s perfect. So perfect that I hope he can accept all of me, even the imperfect parts.
— — —
We’ve been on the terrace, sharing a platter of berries and a lounge chair. We’ve kissed more than once. If I could, I would frame this moment. This one long, languid embrace where time stands still. I wish it’d last forever.
As my eyes begin to close, I dare to ask, “Are you staying with me tonight?”
“What do you want, Abby?”
I snuggle closer to him. We’re sharing a lounge chair, and he’s the most comfortable pillow in the world. The sound of his heart beating soothes me, and his arms around me feel like the only protection I need for the rest of my life.
“You,” I answer, kissing his rough jaw.
“Are you sure?”
“It won’t be the first time we’ve shared a bed, Ahern.”
“You’re tempting me, Abigail.”
“Am I?” I say playfully.
My fingers skim across his bare arm. They want to touch him a little more. Can I take it without running away screaming for my life?
“How far can we go?”
I suck in my breath, going completely still at his question. The only sound I hear is my heart pumping hard.
He kisses the tip of my nose. “I wish I could read your mind.”
“I’m glad that’s not possible. You don’t want to know what’s inside. It’s both scary and sad.”
If it’s too scary for me to handle, I’m terrified that he’ll leave me after I tell him everything. I touch the pendant he gave me in hopes that what he said is true. He’ll always be with me and nothing can come between us.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Wes
After Abby falls asleep, I roll her carefully to her side of the bed and go downstairs for something to drink. I bring the dishes we brought upstairs earlier with me.
“Hey, you’re awake?” I greet my brother, who sits at the kitchen island that’s covered with plastic.
“She’s not going to be happy,” I warn him when I realize that he’s working with clay.
“Abby’s cool as long as I clean up my shit,” he protests without batting an eyelash. He’s busy creating some shitty, shapeless piece of work.
By next month it’ll be at some art gallery selling for a few thousand dollars just because it’s a piece made by the famous Sterling Ahern.
Who knew that playing with dough as a child would pay off so much when he grew up?
“When did you two started banging?”
I huff and set the dirty dishes in the sink.
“I take your silence and brooding to mean that you’re still petting the lizard, palming the oyster, milking the moose?”
Under any other circumstance, I’d lash out about those childish terms. Instead, I laugh. Those were the terms Dad used a few times when we had the talk, or to remind us that jerking off was normal, but we should do it discreetly.
“I swear he gave me the sex talk every