big round ass. “I’ll go out for a run later to keep it off my hips,” I shrug.
“Here, to make up for all the calories that you plan to burn.” He hands over a fortune cookie. I unwrap it, crack it in half and moan. “Ugh.”
I show the hollow cookie to Wes. “They forgot to put in a fortune,” I complain. “What happened to the joy of opening these things? It’s gone.” I shove a piece of cookie in my mouth.
“They’re lies anyway.” Wes, who doesn’t believe in fortunes, narrows his gaze at me.
He’s a pragmatic man. Wes doesn’t believe in fortune cookies, wishing wells, or wishbones. I might not believe that they work, but at least I have a little fun dropping a coin into a fountain or fighting with Sterling over who gets the wishbone on Thanksgiving Day.
“Yes, but it’s good for the heart to read something like, happiness is around the corner. Or… you’re about to find the love of your life.”
Wes’ body shakes with laughter and his cheeks turn red. I arch an eyebrow, giving him an inquisitive look. He hands me his fortune.
Enjoy your cookie.
“That’s it?” Frustrated, I dump the paper into the recycling bin, and I begin picking up the trash.
“When did fortune cookies lose their wisdom?” I huff. “Stop laughing, Weston!”
He can’t control it, but he envelops me in a hug.
Wes rests his chin on top of my head. “I missed you, Abby girl.” His voice carries sadness. “If you’re overwhelmed or having nightmares, you have to let me know.”
“I’ll be fine,” I tell him, hugging him around the waist.
I don’t know if I’m reassuring him or myself. Wes has always made life better and simpler when he’s around. From the moment we met, I knew that in some ways, we were the same. He’s protective of me. From day one, he reassured me that everything would be fine, and that nothing would happen to me.
“How are you?” he asks.
Wes puts his thumbs on the inside of the upper part of my arms and wraps his fingers around my bicep, just above the elbow. His blue eyes stare at me for a few beats. There’s a storm brewing inside them. They haven’t been calm in a long time. I love getting lost in his eyes. His eyes are the perfect place where I like to stare until I forget myself and my past that feels so much more real to me in this state.
Maybe that’s why I love being by the ocean at night. The midnight blue horizon, the sound of the waves and the breeze keep the bad dreams at bay. Just like Wes used to do when I first arrived at his house. He’d sit on the couch, watching me as I counted the crystals of the chandelier that was above my bed, until sleep finally took over. Knowing he was close helped me sleep. Once I left Denver, it became so much easier to breathe, to sleep—to believe that I was finally free.
“Tired,” I say.
“Do you want to stay with me tonight?”
I close my eyes, taking a deep breath. It’d be easy to accept his offer. But it’s time I grow up and get my act together. Staying away wasn’t an option. If I must be here, I should face my demons head on.
“No, I’ll be fine,” I lie, opening my eyes.
He tilts his head from side to side, studying me. Wes wants to know if I’m being honest with him. I remain completely neutral, hoping that I’m still relaxed enough to convince him.
“Abby, it’s me. You don’t have to put on a brave face for me. Why would you want to fake how you’re feeling around me?”
“I’ve never faked my feelings around you—or faked them at all for that matter.” I chuckle. “Though I’m glad you accept that I’m never going to be normal.”
“Abby, what’s going on?”
Other than I feel like I’m losing my shit? Nothing, Wes, thank you for asking.
Would he understand what’s happening to me? Everything I built and who I became over the past five years is suddenly disappearing. I think I forgot to pack my strength while I was packing all my other belongings. My courage was left at the airport security line. Little, scared Abby is back. The girl who felt awkward and out of place while growing up is taking over my body. The tone of normalcy I lived with over the past years vanishes as the minutes pass.
It’s not like I expected