that?’ Sadness and defeat filled his eyes as he tried to smile at me. Sam’s usual kilowatt smile was nowhere in evidence. It was heartbreaking. Maybe I should make his life easier and stop this now.
I shook my head. ‘Sounds like she’s not in a good place.’ I wanted to give him a big hug. He looked distraught. ‘I’m sorry.’ I reached out and squeezed his forearm as if that might help in some stupid pathetic way.
‘Don’t be.’ He pulled a face. ‘I… I made the mistake of telling her that I was seeing someone. She wanted to meet up tonight for a drink. She wants us to be friends. When I told her I was going out tonight, she asked who with. Of course she did.’ He shook his head at his own stupidity.
‘Oh.’ I said in sympathy, because I could see exactly how that would have panned out, Sam too honest to lie and Victoria on it like a sniffer dog. Women always have a sixth sense about these things.
‘I could kick myself. I might as well have issued a personal challenge. The minute I said, “No one you know,” she immediately wanted to know who.’ He rolled his eyes and I could see from his defeated demeanour that she’d worn him down. ‘Eventually I had to tell her. That was this morning.’ He rubbed a hand over his face.
I wondered how many times she’d phoned him today.
‘I feel like a shit … but I’ve been trying to do the right thing. I deliberately waited for a month before I asked you out.’
‘Do you want to take a raincheck?’ I asked, all the happy anticipation vanishing, leaving my voice slightly flat. I looked down at my feet, not wanting him to see the unhappy disappointment I knew I couldn’t hide. ‘Maybe it’s for the best.’
‘Are you kidding me?’ He clutched my arm, as if I might run off. ‘No! It’s over with Vic. I can’t go back now and … I don’t want to.’ With a gentle hand he lifted my chin. ‘Jess, I know this is all a bit crazy and sometimes it doesn’t feel quite real until I see you again and then I know it’s you I want to be with. Yesterday at the pub felt so right and easy.’ With a hesitant smile he added, ‘I’ve not stopped thinking about you. It’s the only thing that’s making all this bearable.’
Those butterflies made a miraculous recovery and took flight in one big surge, making me suck in a quick unexpected breath.
‘Oh!’ I whispered, smiling back at him before saying without thinking, ‘Me too. Holly at work kept throwing things at me today.’ Oops. Perhaps too much information, but because he smiled down at me, I added, ‘I was a bit distracted.’
He stroked my lower lip, sending a sizzle rocketing through me, kick-starting a low hum of longing between my legs. Hello and welcome to Jess the slut. Where had this come from? Suddenly, I wanted to bite down on his index finger and hold onto it between my teeth and lick the pad of his finger. Down, Jess, down.
As if he’d read my mind, Sam gave me a low, lingering, warm smile.
‘You look gorgeous.’
‘You too.’ I reached up and tugged at one of his blond curls, catching sight of a slightly drunken pink rose tucked in his pocket.
‘Nice rose,’ I teased. The blousy pink petals of the droopy flower were well past their best.
He pulled it out of his pocket, the thorn on the stem catching on the fabric and with a suddenly solemn expression handed it over, turning it so the sharp thorn didn’t touch my hand. ‘I’m supposed to give this to you. Sorry,’ he pulled a face, ‘it didn’t like the heat. I did put it in water for a while but then I was worried I’d forget it. And then I’d be in big trouble.’
‘Thank you.’ From the serious expression on his face and the careful precision with which he gave it to me, the flower was clearly laden with some significance I had yet to divine.
‘Esme in my class said I had to give it to you especially, if you looked pretty tonight. She’s seven.’
My heart did a little bungy jump at his words and the considering tilt of his head, tipped to one side as he gazed down with a tender smile that had me turning to complete mush.
‘Pretty girls get flowers apparently, and she was worried I didn’t