of my things. I found ground nuts when searching for wood for our raft." He comes and sits next to me, folding his big legs under as he takes his place by the fire. "They might be a little bitter, but the meat in them will be good and if we roast them, it will hide the flavor." He hesitates and then holds the branch out to me. "They are from my home."
His voice is soft as he says it, and I realize that this is a big deal for him, sharing this with me. It's one of the last meals he'll ever have from the island itself. I can't imagine I'd be so generous if someone put a pizza under my nose. I touch his arm. "Thank you. These are the ones Lauren had when she was on the island?" When he nods, I touch one, studying it. They're smaller than coconuts, hard and brown and the size of a tennis ball, maybe bigger, the shell a plain, unassuming brown. There's six in the cluster, and the branch looks withered and pathetic after being left on the beach for so long. I offer the branch back to him. "Will you show me how to open one?"
U'dron nods and picks one up. Before I can ask if we need a knife of some kind, he grabs one and SLAMS it against his brow.
I jump, making a startled squawk. "What the fuck!?"
He blinks at me, lowering his hand, and I realize that he didn't smack it against his head—he struck it against the base of one of his horns. U'dron holds the nut out to me, and it looks as if it's been split neatly in half, the inside a pale yellow with a dark brown “egg” in the middle, kind of like an avocado.
I giggle, slapping his arm. "You scared the shit out of me."
U'dron's smile is slow to spread across his face. "That was how I was taught, when I was Pak's age, to open a ground nut." He leans close to me as if sharing a secret. "Though I have smacked myself in the head several times with one before."
I laugh, taking the half he offers me and touching it with a fingertip. "I wasn't expecting that, but you do have a rather hard head."
He snorts, the sound amused, and then shows me how to carefully tuck the shell into the coals. We watch the nuts as they cook, oil beading up off of the center, which Lauren told me was like peanut butter. Just thinking about peanut butter makes my mouth water, and I realize it must be afternoon and we haven't eaten anything. There's a waterskin thoughtfully left behind by Juth and we've taken turns drinking out of it all day. U'dron hands it to me silently and I sip it, the water sloshing in my empty stomach.
Now would be a good time to ask him who he resonated to, I think. Just get it out there, get it in the open, and move on with my life. I hand the waterskin back and look over at him. "So…"
I watch as he tilts the skin back and drains it, a droplet sliding down his skin and disappearing into his chin scruff. He pokes his tongue out, licking the hardened rim of the skin's lip, and I find that I'm utterly fascinated by the sight of that tongue tip and the ridges that seem to cascade all the way down his tongue.
U'dron glances over at me. "So…?" He prompts.
"A…raft?" I manage, voice hoarse. "Can we build one tonight?"
"It will not be a fantastic one, but yes, we can make a reasonable craft." He glances over at me through his lashes. "Unless you would like to spend more time here waiting for Juth to return."
If I said yes, would he stay with me, I wonder? I've already stalled us once with my ankle story. What's a few more days? Part of me kind of wants to put off the inevitable, because I know it's going to kill me to see him resonating to someone else. He's always been my…buddy. Well, not really a buddy. More than a friend, less than a lover. My best friend, if I have to put a label on it. The person I trust more than anyone else on this planet.
And I'm losing him. It's probably Steph. Or Sam. Maybe Daisy. Flor? Bridget?
Does it even matter? I'm going to be miserable any way it