just as a surge of heat stung my inner wrist. Gone. The oath was absolved in an instant. I glanced down at my wrist in time to see the black scythe burn away like a scrap of parchment over a flame. As I did that, something else came into focus: a lifeless body at my feet. Slowly, I blinked. And then realization slammed into me with so much force that I lost my breath.
Leena. Leena.
Her unmoving form dominated my vision, and the world around me blurred. I’d killed my anam-cara. Time slowed. Memories collided in a riotous mess. Amira and Bowen’s twisted words. Yazmin’s control. How I’d battled my brothers just for the chance to murder my love. And then succeeded. A splintering scream ruptured from my chest, and I went to cradle her head.
I never made it. Calem crashed into me, a snarling mess of scales and elongated fangs. His beast had broken through my compulsion. Half-feral, half-human, he tossed me to the side with otherworldly strength and then dropped on all fours defensively over Leena. In the flurry of movement, one of his paws had swiped her body. Blood flowed outward from the deep gashes, spreading across the stone floor and momentarily pulling his attention. Confusion raced through his pupil-less, mercury eyes. Then, horror. He recoiled, and the action forced his scales to recede.
“Oh gods,” he croaked. He scooted away, eyes locked on the blood creeping across the floor. Ozias and Kost rushed over, their forms trembling.
“Give me some room,” Kost commanded, dropping to his knees. A thick gash ran the length of his jaw. Disheveled hair was flecked with blood. He straddled Leena and began pressing his hands rhythmically against her chest. Her head jostled, and unseeing hazel eyes tore through my soul.
I scrambled toward them, but Ozias intervened, caging me in his arms. “Let him work!”
Rational thought escaped me. All I could do was scream and snarl and tear against Ozias’s grip. He never wavered, and I was forced to simply look at what I’d done. At her lifeless face. Parted lips unmoving. Pink flush quickly fading from her cheeks. Limp hands. I’d murdered the love of my life. Again.
Raw pain scoured through me and set fire to everything I knew. She couldn’t be dead. I couldn’t live without her.
“If it’s my time, then you have to let me go.”
“No!” I yelled at the memory of her words. It wasn’t her time. I wouldn’t let her go. Not now. Not ever.
Calem was sobbing as Kost worked, each one of his compressions forcing more blood out of her wound. Kost tried to stop most of it by pressing his thigh against the laceration, but there was only so much he could do. His compressions were timed but forceful, as if he could barely restrain the raging emotions inside him. He paused to tilt her head back and open her airway. Pressing his lips to hers, he breathed life into her lungs. And I willed her body to accept it. To freely take what he was offering so she could breathe on her own again. But after two breaths her lungs still weren’t moving on their own, and Kost was back to compressing.
“Noc.” Kost spoke as he worked. “Will you raise her?”
Ozias grunted, and wet tears stung my shoulder from where his cheek rested. Goodbye wasn’t an option. It shouldn’t have been. And yet, that’s what she would’ve wanted. She’d made that clear. To rob her of that choice… I broke free of Ozias’s arms and slid to the floor by her head. My hands fluttered around her temples.
“Please,” Calem begged from a few feet away. “Raise her. If she dies… I can’t…” He choked back a sob. With shaky hands, he fished his bronze key out of his pocket and summoned Effie. “Can you help?”
She flew over Leena, dusting both her and Kost in a shimmery coat of magic, but nothing changed. Leena didn’t move, and Kost kept working. Effie landed back beside Calem with a sorrowful coo, and he crumpled.
What do I do? All my life I’d been selfish. I’d been selfish as a prince, and it had cost Amira her life. I’d been selfish with Bowen, and I’d been selfish with my guild. With the Gyss’s wish. And now…
Again, Kost breathed for her. One breath. Two. Nothing.
Oz stared at her, eyes glassy. “I say we raise her. Let her be mad at us. I’ll take that over this.”
“Noc.” Kost’s voice was pleading. He kept compressing,