lined against a farm as we drove by, thinking of Ray. Since I stayed overnight in the hospital, my first day back at school would be Tuesday. The extra time between seeing him only added to the weight I already felt pressing down on my chest.
But before him, I’d have to see the twins. Face the responsibility of breaking their dreams. We got to the house, and I stared at my muddy car parked in the driveway.
Mom followed my eyes. “Your dad and Leroy went to get it.”
Ignoring the deepening ache in my chest, I reached into the back seat for the overnight bag my parents had brought me.
“I can get that,” Mom offered.
“I’m perfectly capable of doing it on my own.” There was ice in my voice, but I didn’t care. I was almost eighteen. I wasn’t a child anymore, no matter how much my parents insisted on treating me like one.
We walked inside, and Cori immediately greeted me and wrapped her arms around me. “I’m so glad you’re okay.”
Mom kept walking, leaving the living room as Cori and I embraced. I squeezed her back, fighting tears. Having someone in the house who was there for me, who believed in me, felt amazing.
“How has it been here?” I whispered, starting toward our room.
She winced. “Mom and Rosie had a huge blow-out. The twins have been awful. Temper tantrums and crying fits and not listening at all. Dad’s been on the phone constantly, talking to people at the store. He even threatened to fire Knox since his girls ‘can’t control themselves around boys.’”
So many people were hurting because of my actions, steeping me in guilt. “I feel terrible about the twins,” I admitted, dropping my bag on the bed, then sitting beside it. “And Knox. He just started.”
Cori went to her own bed and sat down. “Why? It’s not like you wanted to get stuck in a blizzard and have an asthma attack.”
The simple, straightforward way she saw things was a talent I wished I possessed. I’d been doing guilty mental acrobatics in my mind, finding new ways to torture myself each second.
“What have Mom and Dad said about it?” I asked.
Cori rolled her eyes. “Typical Mom and Dad stuff—'can’t manage on your own,’ ‘can’t trust you,’ ‘needs help,’ blah, blah, blah.”
Her tone might have been flippant, but the words were anything but. They were exactly the opposite of what I wanted my parents to think after this weekend. “Did you get in trouble?”
Her curls bounced as she shook her head. “I think they were more preoccupied with you being in the hospital and the twins losing their minds.”
“The twins should be upset,” I said, staring toward the ceiling, trying to keep the tears at bay. “I ruined their big chance.”
“They’re eight years old,” Cori said. “There will be more big chances.”
I lifted a corner of my lips and went to hug her. “Thanks, Cor.”
“Love you. And don’t you dare let your inhaler run out again. You hear me, young lady?”
I pulled back and grinned at her. “Yes, Mom.”
Fifty
I left our room to find the twins in their room, lying on Tarra’s bed and staring at a show playing on their tablet.
I knocked on their open door, and they both swiveled their heads toward me, identical expressions of disgust and hatred on their faces. They both turned back to the screen.
I took a few tentative steps forward. “Can I talk to you two?”
“No,” they said in unison.
Anger at myself, at the situation, grew in my chest. They were taking this whole twin actresses thing seriously. They had some real potential to be divas on set. I couldn’t blame them for being upset, but I was their sister. I deserved at least to be heard.
I walked to their bed and grabbed the tablet.
“Hey!” Cara cried.
“We were watching that!” Tarra said.
I held it to my chest. “You can keep watching”—I looked at the screen—“Teen Witch when I’ve properly apologized.”
“Save it,” Tarra said. “We’re not forgiving you.”
She might have been eight, but her words cut just as much as anyone my age. And by the way Cara was nodding, they were both on the same page. Divide and conquer was not going to be a solid strategy this time.
“Look,” I said, staring at both of them. “You can hate me forever, but just hear what I have to say, okay?”
“Why should we?” Cara asked.
I shook my head, looking up for inspiration and finding nothing but a poster of Ryde Alexander. “Because I’m your