around the corner. “Sorry I’m late,” he said, offering his hand to help me off the rock. I started to decline it, then thought, You know, that’s an awfully good excuse to touch him. His grip was warm and sure around my hand, and I jumped to the ground.
“Hi,” he said, still holding my hand.
“Hi.” I returned his smile. After that leap, my heart was lodged somewhere in my throat. “I thought you’d left already,” I said, swallowing around my heartbeats. “I’m glad you didn’t.”
“Me, too. I’m sorry I’m late. My campers, the Webelos—” He shook his head, cutting himself off. “It’s not important. Well, it was important to them. But if you aren’t ten years old, it’s, like, super boring.”
I laughed, watching worry lines appear and dance on his forehead and nose. “It’s okay. Let’s go,” I said.
Alert lines replaced the worry ones. “You don’t have much time before you have to be back, I bet.” His hand twitched in mine.
I shook my head and dropped his hand. “Rehearsal at one.”
“Okay then.” He cinched up the straps on his backpack and pointed us down the opposite path from the one we took during the lunchtime hike. “That’s us. We’re looking to make sure the rock cairns are in place and spaced close enough so people don’t get nervous thinking they’ve lost the trail. You’ll be useful because you’ve never been here. So, look for the cairns.”
I raised my eyebrows at this all-business Jesse and tried to match his tone. “Rock cairns. Piles of rocks, right?”
He nodded. “Little stacks. They look human-made. If you start to feel like it’s been too long since you’ve seen one, tell me, and we’ll make more.”
He peered over my shoulder and down the path, and my stomach dropped a little. Is that all I was? Useful because I hadn’t been on this hike? I knew I was overthinking this whole Jesse-liking-me thing. Will was just trying to make me feel better after all the crap with Ben and the team.
Something must have shown on my face because Jesse touched my arm. “You okay?”
I looked up at Jesse. His deep brown eyes were pools of concern.
And then I decided. After all of the conversations with myself in my head surrounding Ben, the doubt, the interpreting, worrying about the past and the future—I didn’t want to do that anymore. I wanted my present back. Be in the moment, Jane Lloyd would say.
Jane Lloyd would have also told me to Say yes, to Jesse’s question, but that didn’t feel like the right thing to do. Maybe Say yes was more complicated than I’d thought. Or maybe it was time I just focused on the first rule: Trust yourself.
I opened my mouth and blurted out, “I like holding your hand. Can I do that?”
His eyes lit up. “You can definitely do that. You have a hand preference?”
I grinned, all relief. “Let me look.”
He made a production of presenting both hands to me, front and back. I examined them with mock solemnity.
“Left,” I proclaimed.
He bowed a little and presented his left hand. I took it in my right.
“Ready?” he asked, his grip firm.
“Uh . . . one other thing.” I couldn’t meet his eye, but I had to know. “Did you ask me on this hike because you needed someone who hadn’t been on it, and I was the only person you could think of, or—”
He tugged on my hand. I looked up at him.
“I asked you because . . .” With his free hand, he rubbed the back of his neck. “I wanted . . . to spend time with you. Just you. But I also know you like to be useful. And so . . .” he trailed off.
I dropped my head to hide the pleased grin blooming on my face. We’d only seen each other a few times, and yet, it already felt like he knew me.
“Is that okay?” he asked, his voice strained.
I met his eyes, still beaming. “More than okay.”
“Okay.” His smile was back. “Lead the way, new hiker.”
We were quiet for a while. I concentrated on the feeling of holding his hand and of my hand being held by his. Apparently, he was doing the same thing.
“You have soft hands,” he said. “Well, this one is anyway.”
I laughed. “They both are,” I assured him. Then I thought about Curley in Of Mice and Men and how he keeps one hand gloved with Vaseline to keep it soft for his wife, but as I