the nurse’s office have . . . stuff?” Ben asked, scanning the list.
Sirena shrugged. “Everything went bad because it’s been so long since a girl needed supplies.”
Now I stared at Sirena. Menstrual products didn’t expire. They’re absorbent—not medicinal.
But apparently along with Ben not knowing women’s cycles don’t align after being together less than a week, he also didn’t know about nonexistent expiration dates. Still, he didn’t agree to the errand yet.
“Roger and Dion would go, but they left for a nighttime hike,” Emily continued. “And we’re too embarrassed to ask the Pauls. And we don’t know the other coaches.”
“Would anyone like to drive with me?” Ben looked at me.
“. . . Is something you’d say if staff were allowed to transport campers in their personal vehicles,” I blurted.
Ben bit his lip. We all smiled expectantly.
“Look, I’ll see if anyone has a trip planned down the mountain after dinner.” He turned to me. “Remember. We’re eating as a team.”
“See, I’m not sure I can wait,” Emily said, her voice trembling.
Ben sighed. “What difference is an hour going to make?”
Tears welled up in Emily’s eyes. “It’s just . . . there’s blood everywhere. It looks like someone’s been murdered in our cabin.” She grabbed Ben’s arm. “Murdered, Ben!”
He wiggled out of her grip. “I’m going, I’m going.” Locking eyes with me, he said, “I’ll see you later.”
“Thanks, Ben!” we all chorused.
We waited until we heard him descend the stairs and turn the corner. Then I hugged each Gilda in turn.
“You are all geniuses,” I whispered. “And I will pay you back every penny.”
Sirena shook her head and hip-checked Emily. “It was her idea.”
“Brilliant job, Emily,” I said. “And those tears at the end! What a finale!”
“Why, thank you!” She curtseyed. “I figured my constant crying had to be good for something.”
I looked at each of them as they chuckled at Emily. I took a deep breath to tell them about Ben in the woods. But then Paloma cracked her knuckles and said, “Time to go tell the Pauls.”
“Whoa whoa whoa,” I put my hands up. “Tell the Pauls what? Ben was a jerk to me?”
“Uh,” Paloma squinted at me like I was dumb. “That, and the other things. The things you told us. The nurse’s office?”
If Paloma wanted me to talk to the Pauls now, there was no way she wouldn’t march me in there herself if she knew about what Ben had done to me in the woods. But wasn’t that partially my fault? I hadn’t told him no right away. And how could I prove what he had done?
I decided to keep the woods encounter to myself.
“How is telling them going to make me look?” I said. “Sure, yes, it’s been hard, but I can handle myself. Prime attack zones: spectacles and testicles.”
Paloma rubbed my back. “You looked like you had PTSD or something coming out of that room with Ben. You can’t spectacle/testicle your way out of emotional trauma.”
“I’m not getting emotionally traumatized,” I insisted.
They frowned at me.
“I’m not!”
Paloma sighed. “Look. We saw what happened at rehearsal. That’s abusive. And you’re getting used to it!”
I shook my head. “It’s never been that bad before.”
“What makes you think it’s going to be buckets of sunshine from here on out?” Hanna asked. She rapped her knuckles on my skull. “Wake up, Zelda-girl. That guy is an asshole.”
“I’m not telling the Pauls,” I said. “I mean, best-case scenario—they tell Ben to be nicer to me, and I look like a cry baby who can’t handle playing with the big boys.”
“Didn’t you hear Dion and Roger today?” Sirena asked. “They thought he was out of line, too.”
I shrugged. “Did they go talk to the Pauls afterward?”
Everyone looked at each other. “I don’t think so,” Sirena said.
“So? It was just a difference in philosophy. It’s not going to stand up in court. You know, Paul court. We’re not going.”
After a moment, Emily asked in a small voice, “So all those tampons were for nothing?”
“You should see that list.” Sirena smiled. “We asked for triple allday protection extra-strength tampons with wings.”
“Tampons don’t have wings,” I said.
“Ah, but, we figured Ben doesn’t know that.” Hanna slid an arm around me and led me down the steps where we ran into Will.
“Are you going to tell the Pauls?” he asked. The Gildas passed around us, giving us some privacy.
“You, too?” I shook my head. “I’m fine. I’ll be fine.”
He pulled on one of my curls—a habit from childhood that always delighted him and infuriated me. I batted