because of your time here.”
I blushed. “I don’t know about that. Just that you saved my life.”
Whether it was fate or pure luck that I'd ended up in Mrs. Quinn’s care, I didn't know. That was the one thing that had gone my way after everything else had failed. My own family had once and for all exiled me from their lives, but because of that, I had her. She'd accepted a stranger without question and never made me feel anything less than loved. Without her, I didn't know where I’d be.
Her expression turned soft. “Have you thought about a trip to Wyoming?”
“I’m sorry, Easy. But I can’t do it. Not even for you.”
His words had been on replay in my head. He couldn’t try. Not even for me. I shook my head. “We could have fixed things before. And I know I should go after what I want, but I need him to come after me. That’s silly, but I have to know it’s not me chasing after another guy. I need to be enough.”
“Give him a little more time.”
“I’m not going to look for a new relationship, but I’m not going to wait around either. He made his choice. It hurts. More than I want to admit. But . . .”
“You’re an incredibly strong woman.”
Coming from Mrs. Quinn, that meant a lot. Her faith in me had never ceased, and apart from Trish, she was the only person who’d ever shown that level of support. Well, that wasn’t exactly true. Holt had shown he’d believed in me when he’d offered the loft at his garage for my makeup line. But even he didn’t want to stick around to be with me. Was that what strength amounted to?
“Being strong isn’t what it’s cracked up to be.”
Chapter Forty-Five
Holt
I shoved clothes into a bag.
Then dumped them back out.
“Shit.”
I kicked at the mess on the floor. The picture of Celia and me floated on top of a shirt. I snatched it up and studied my face.
I looked happy. Unburdened. Days like that near the lake made me forget about what I’d left behind in New York. It wasn’t always like that, but often enough that I could survive.
I pulled out my phone and opened my camera roll. Baker and me on the sofa. Baker and me at Dino’s. Me with lips shiny with her gloss. My face buried against her neck before I took off for work.
Every single day with Baker I was happy. Even on the days we fought. Maybe not so much on the ones she wasn’t speaking to me. But it didn’t take a genius to know what—or who, rather—had turned this hole inside of me to a cavern.
Time and distance was supposed to make this easier, but it hadn’t. I missed her like mad.
My decision to stay in Wyoming had made things clearer. It was good to be with the guys again. I enjoyed working at the park, but it wasn’t as fulfilling as I remembered.
Or maybe I’d changed.
My reasons for staying didn’t seem as pressing as they once had been. I’d run to New York to get away from my problems and found my soul had healed a little while I was there.
I’d spent most of my days thinking about Easy. I couldn't shower without her on my mind. Pizza and beer didn’t have the same appeal without sharing it with her.
The nights weren't any better. My bed was cold and empty without her warmth. Her laugh. Her honesty.
I tossed the picture back on the floor and scooped my stuff back into my bag. There was a flight to Chicago in two hours. From there, it should be easy to get back where I belonged. I just needed to make one more stop before the airport.
* * *
The cemetery was a small plot on the land Cameron’s family owned outside of town. He’d always said he’d been born here and he’d die here. I guessed he was right.
The grass was cut and there were fresh flowers on each of the headstones. I hadn’t been to this spot since the funeral all those months ago, but I remembered exactly where I was going.
I stood and stared at the granite slab with his name permanently etched in it. Somehow it didn’t seem possible he was gone, never to return.
“I was so angry at you, Cameron.”
I didn’t say anything else for a minute, like I thought he might respond. Somehow releasing those words felt huge. They hung between me and