mean?”
“Thank God!” Is hooted by Sage. “You two are finally done with your stupid ass pretending and are back together.”
I look over at her like a damn deer in headlights. “You knew too?”
She looks at me like I’m the dumbest person that she’s ever met, making Danny chuckle. “Girl, you two were shit at hiding it. We were all just waiting for you two to come clean. Then Bimbo Barbie happened and we were all just waiting for Danny’s sorry ass to get his shit together and get you back.” She puts her hands on her hips and frowns. “Damn did it take forever. Do you have any idea what it’s been like for the rest of us dealing with his grumpy and pathetically mopey ass all these months? I swear to Christ girl, if you ever try to leave him again, I’m going to kidnap your ass and drag you back to him. The girls and I can not deal with him being all sad and moody because he’s missing you. I’ll get JJ’s handcuffs and cuff you to Danny until you agree to never leave him again.”
“What the hell is wrong with the two of you?” I mutter out loud. “You two realize that you can’t just chain,” I give Danny a side eyed look, “or handcuff,” I make sure to look at Sage, “people to someone else. Normal people don’t do that.”
“Welcome to the crazy train bitch.” Sage chuckles. “No one in this family is sane. But you’re stuck with all of us now. Just hop aboard and enjoy the ride. It makes life a hell of a lot easier when you just give in and go with the craziness.”
“I still haven’t agreed to anything!” I huff out my lie.
“Girl, you on are his damn lap, drying humping him…again.” She gives me a pointed look that causes me to flush. “For real just fess up to it already and let us all be happy. Because one more denial and I can’t promise you that our girls really won’t kidnap you and chain you to their daddy. He’s been miserable, making all of us miserable. Either they’re going to kidnap you or kill him.”
“The girls would never hurt me.” Danny sputters. Right, because that’s what he should be focusing on. Not the fact that Sage has mentioned kidnapping me…twice.
Good grief. What the hell have I gotten myself into with all of them?
Sage looks over at Danny with a completely serious expression. “You are one more moody day away from having an accident Daniel. The girls have already been asking to borrow a gun to put you out of your misery. And unfortunately, Marc has told them that you ‘accidentally’ getting hit by a bus would mean that they would still get your life insurance and not go to jail.”
Danny finally lets me off of his lap and urges me to take a seat in one of the chairs. I sit down gratefully. My knees are killing me from that desk right now.
He scrubs his hand down his face. “Why the hell do I keep you in my life? In another year I should be finally rid of your ass. But nope. My dumb ass keeps you as my best friend and business partner.”
She crosses her arms over her chest and taps her sneaker clad foot against the floor. “It’s words like that, that make me regret making you my son’s godfather.”
I smile to myself. I always thought that it was cute that they had such a good friendship after all these years. I’ve seen and heard horror stories about baby mama/daddy drama. The fact that he is her son’s godfather is the sweetest thing that I’ve ever heard.
Danny snorts at her comment though. “You had to make me his godfather. Who else would be crazy enough to raise another one of your offspring if something ever happened to you? Shit, we have three, might as well add a fourth to the mix. At least with JJ’s genes he might not turn out to be pure evil.”
“Hello dumbass,” Sage waves her hand in the air, “they’re an evil trifecta. Obviously, JJ’s genes dole out evilness as well.”
Danny shakes his head. “Nah, I know about his ex-wife. That’s where Paige gets it from.”
Sage scrunches up her nose and tilts her head. “Okay, you’re probably right about that one. That woman is pure evil.”
“Oh my God! You two need to stop. Your daughters are not evil.” I say in total seriousness.