dating anyone before the accident, they changed the subject. It was so maddening—them ignoring the fact that I wanted answers—that I finally stopped asking. I figured there was a reason they kept it from me. Anyway,” I said with a chuckle. “I saw this man at the coffee shop, and something inside me came to life. It was so strange, Saryn. I actually grabbed my purse and ran out of the museum to follow him when I saw him get up from the table. Penny, my co-worker, thought I’d lost my mind.”
“Did you catch up with him?” Saryn asked with a smile in her voice.
A familiar feeling of sadness washed over me. “No. I followed him for a few blocks. He stopped at a flower cart, but he didn’t buy any. Well, that’s not true. I saw him give the girl money and he wrote something down on a card. And the craziest thing was, later that day, someone sent me flowers. There wasn’t a name, just a note saying to enjoy the sun that day.”
I pressed my fingers to my mouth to hold back the silly grin I knew I had on my face. “I swear he was the one who sent them.” I drew in a deep breath and pushed away the giddiness that had come over me. “Anyway, from that night on, he was the man in my dreams. It was his face I had put in my dreams. And Lord, did he do wicked things to me. Well, in my dreams, that is.”
“Linnzi! My goodness!”
We both laughed.
“You haven’t dated? At all?” she asked.
I chewed on my lip and turned to look at Saryn. She was stopped at a light, so when she faced me, I knew I had to tell her. Finally share my secrets with someone I had a history with. My logic had been insane, according to Penny. My counselor didn’t think it was insane at all. She believed deep down inside my conscience that I was still in love with someone, but I couldn’t—or wouldn’t—remember who. I needed to know what Saryn thought.
“No. I don’t know how to explain this without sounding crazy. I think I’ve already given my heart to someone else. It just didn’t feel right to be with another man. Plus, I was married to my job, and I honestly wasn’t interested in dating anyone. The prospect of meeting someone and falling in love in France didn’t seem appealing to me either. I knew someday I’d be coming back to Texas, so that would only complicate an already complicated situation.”
Her eyes went wide. “So, you really haven’t dated anyone? In almost eight years?”
Saryn didn’t realize she had just given me a clue to my past. I must have been dating someone when I had the accident, or right before. “I know, it makes zero sense. A part of me has this idea that someone is out there, waiting for me to find him.”
Saryn reached over and took my hand in hers. Her eyes filled with excitement and hope. “I agree, a hundred percent.”
I smiled and squeezed her hand. “You’re so sweet to agree with me. My counselor thinks there was someone in my life from that missing timeframe. And the only way I can finally uncover that missing piece of my puzzle is to be where I was during that time. So, here I am, on a new journey to find answers. It’s been so many years of telling my folks I didn’t want to know, that now they actually avoid telling me anything when I do ask a simple question here or there. That’s why I knew it was time to come home.”
“You know, I could fill in…”
I lifted my hand. “No.” The word came out harsher than I wanted it to. “I know it seems so silly that I don’t want to talk about it, yet I say I want answers. I’m trying to work this out on my own. There is a reason my mind is blocking my memory, and I might not ever get it back. I know it must be hard to not say anything, so thank you for respecting my wishes all these years.”
She nodded, but her eyes had glassed over some.
The car behind us honked, and we both jumped and let out a little scream. The light was green, and Lord knows how long we had been sitting there.
As Saryn quickly accelerated onto the highway, she tossed me a quick, knowing look. “Oh,