backpack on her shoulders.
“Did you need something?” Austin asked, sounding like he was in a daze.
“Nope.” Fiona beamed. “Just wanted to show my support for the community. I’m about to head up the trail, though. You guys want to get together for sushi after?”
“…No?” Austin replied.
“What Austin means is that we’re busy after this.” I tried to cover for him, unsure of what Fiona’s response might’ve been to him brushing her off.
“Understandable.” Fiona sighed. “I was always super busy when I had a boyfriend, too.” Fiona then offered us a huge wave before she began to walk past us, continuing up the trail. “See you guys later, then! And keep me posted on your calendar! I’m always up for sushi!”
“We should probably head back to the Bed & Breakfast,” Austin suggested. “Before she comes back down the trail. Do you think you got enough photos for the day?”
“No, but… I’m not sure I really care about the photos anymore,” I admitted, offering him a smile.
“Oh.” Austin smiled at me in return as his cheeks began to redden right in front of me.
6
Austin
Jack kissed me.
Jack kissed me, and I was pretty sure he would’ve done more with me too if Fiona hadn’t accidentally ruined the moment. Although, I had to admit that a part of me was grateful for the interruption.
Because I wasn’t sure if Jack had reached a verdict yet about whether or not he was interested in guys for sure, or if he’d ever even be interested in kissing me like that again. He’d seemed pretty satisfied with himself—and with me—after our first kiss, but I knew all too well that a first kiss didn’t mean much in the grand scheme of things. I’d kissed straight guys before, guys who were fine making out with me in the backseat and no less than twenty-four hours later were back to being fully straight, no longer interested in me or anything having to do with me.
The situation with Jack was making me so nervous that it was a struggle to get through dinner. Jack had joined the family again, this time spending the majority of his conversation at the dining room table entertaining Iris with stories about his adventures overseas, with Derek joining in with stories of his own. The two of them shared tales back and forth, comparing notes on various countries, encompassing an array of topics ranging from the typical weather, to the best restaurants in the capital, to the conditions of the roads.
It was dizzying and disarming, seeing Jack in what seemed like his natural habitat, entertaining guests around the table, being the most interesting person in the room. For a brief moment, I wondered if there was a possible scenario where Jack’s interest in me would’ve waned, not because he’d lost interest in men, but because he’d specifically lost interest in me, no longer fascinated by my connection to his friend, Edward Williams, no longer dazzled by my career as a detective either.
By the time dinner was almost over, I’d convinced myself that whatever spark was between Jack and me was already starting to burn out. And when everyone was officially done with the meal, pushing their plates away, I excused myself from the table, hastily making my way to the back porch.
When I stepped out onto the porch, the moon hanging in the sky casting a bright glow on the grass, the chairs, the wood, and the world, I slid down against the nearest wall, my backside soon connecting with the floor. I took in deep breath after deep breath as my brain rationalized things faster than I had time to process them as thoughts.
Okay. Okay. Okay.
I just need to think this through.
I needed to find a way not to die of embarrassment the next time I spoke to Jack and he acted like nothing had happened between us. I needed to find a way to brush everything under the rug so that I could at least remain friends with Jack, at least while he stayed in town, even as I had to watch him go through his sexual awakening in real-time, hanging out with guys he’d met at a local bar.
Hanging out with guys who weren’t me.
“Here you are again.” Jack’s voice was light as he walked out on the porch. He found his place beside me on the wall, sliding down to match me, our shoulders at an even level. “What did it this time?”
“What do you mean?” I asked without looking over at