mirror, I knew I wouldn’t be able to deny him.
Zachary Messiah knew me; he knew my heart. I didn’t want to risk giving it to anyone else. Not when people had a history of leaving me.
My eyes started to flutter closed, but Zach pinned me with a hard look. He needed to see me, to know this was real.
He leaned down, kissing me, sliding his tongue against mine in deep erotic licks. “I want to hate you, Calli, I want to hate you so much...”
“But you can’t.” I gave him a sad smile because I couldn’t hate him either.
Something flashed in Zach’s eyes, but he didn’t reply. Instead, he loved my body, silently tell me everything I needed to know.
Zach didn’t hate me.
He hated to love me.
And the feeling was entirely mutual.
“Better?” Zach asked me as I entered the room, towel drying my hair. His eyes ran down my body, the oversized Steinbeck SU t-shirt barely covering my thighs. But surprisingly, I didn’t feel shy under his intense gaze, I felt all warm inside again.
I felt strong.
“Yeah, thanks.” My cheeks pinked as I realized my slip. “Crap, I didn’t mean—”
“I know what you meant, Calli.” He patted the bed and I climbed up beside him. “So your dad’s still an asshole, huh?”
“Yup. I’ve kinda accepted that’s how it’ll always be. He just doesn’t get me.” A small shrug lifted my shoulders.
I wasn’t male for starters, or an athlete. Aside from the DNA we shared we had nothing in common. Not a single thing.
Silence settled between us as I scooched down and lay beside Zach, shoulder to shoulder. Just the two of us like old times up in the tree house, basking in the aftermath of what just happened.
“Can I ask you something?” I said, breaking the thick silence.
“You want to know what happened junior year.”
“Yeah...” I steeled my spine. “I’ve thought about that moment a lot. Replayed Homecoming and the surrounding days over and over in my mind.” I swallowed the fresh wave of tears. I didn’t want to cry, not again. But it was just so damn frustrating.
Zach stiffened beside me, but I didn’t look over at him. If I did, the tears would fall, and I knew I needed to brace myself for whatever was about to come.
The truth of why he betrayed me so brutally.
“It all seems so insignificant now,” he said quietly.
Insignificant?
How could anything about what happened that year be insignificant?
I’d given him my heart, my body... my virginity, and then he’d cast me aside for the game that had ruined my entire childhood.
“My dad informed me at the beginning of junior year that he wanted me to play for the team.”
“What? I don’t understand.” My voice cracked as I tried to rein in my emotion.
“He said I’d had enough time to rebel and that it was time to become who I was born to be. Obviously, I told him to go fuck himself.”
“You never said anything?” Hurt lashed my insides. Back then, Zach and I didn’t keep secrets from one another, at least, I didn’t think we had.
I guessed I was wrong.
“Because I knew what it would do to us.” He let out a steady breath. “You hated basketball more than me, Calli. I didn’t want to put you through that. I had no intentions of ever playing. I didn’t want to be Declan 2.0. I just wanted to be me...” Zach trailed off, lost to the memories.
“I was so excited about Homecoming, about finally being with you. But right before I came to pick you up, my father collared me and started saying all this stuff about the family legacy and doing the right thing and that I was too young to be in love. He kept harping on about childhood sweethearts rarely going the distance. I knew he wasn’t going to let it drop, but I wanted to enjoy Homecoming with my girl, so I pushed it to the back of my mind.”
Zach’s hand found mine and he tangled our fingers together. It felt so natural... so right. But there was still a vastness between us. “That night was one of the best nights of my life, Calli. I realized I didn’t care about my dad hounding me to play, it was just a game. A stupid game. I figured I could play and keep him happy and we could still look forward to our future. So I decided to tell you.”
His fingers tightened around mine, and I finally risked peeking over at