had, but I needed him, I needed us to be closer, to fix the wounds we’d inflicted on each other with lovemaking.
He pulled back suddenly, looking into my eyes with a serious expression. “Shit. I forgot to say I love you. I rehearsed the whole thing in the car.”
Laughter pealed out of me, and then he pulled off his t-shirt and I did the same, lying topless underneath him.
“I love you too.” I looked up at the scar on his chest and a thought struck me. “Wait, are you cleared for sex? I mean … will you?” I stuck my tongue out of my mouth and crossed my eyes.
Ashton’s gaze hooded as he reached over to the coffee table and pulled the icing bag into his right hand, supporting his weight with his left. “I had something different in mind.”
He brought the tip of the icing bag to my left nipple and squeezed a little dollop of rainbow icing, then did the same on the right. My heart picked up five notches as I anticipated him licking this off, but he didn’t stop there. He put a dot of icing in my belly button too and heat exploded between my legs. It was summer, I was wearing tiny silk jammie shorts, which he easily removed as I tucked my butt up into the air. After the final dot of icing had been applied, I couldn’t wait any longer.
“Ashton,” I whimpered, grabbing his neck and pulling him closer to me. Dipping low, he sucked the dollop of icing from my left nipple and wetness pooled between my legs.
“Mmm,” he growled.
Leaning up to kiss me, I tasted the sweetness on his tongue and remarked in the back of my mind that it was the perfect level of sweet and not too buttery. When he dipped down to go for my right nipple, he also plunged one finger inside of me. It caught me so off guard I cried out with pleasure like those stupid girls in the movies did. But this was real. This was the realest thing I’d ever had. Everything with Ashton was ramped up a notch, the pleasure and the pain. When he got to my bellybutton I was aching, tipping my hips into his fingers, begging for release.
When his strong fingers were replaced by a soft wet tongue, I lost my mind. The orgasm slammed into me, fast and hard, like I’d been holding on to it for months. My butt squeezed together, thigh muscles quaking as I grasped his hair and guided his gentle lapping. I shook for what seemed like a full minute before collapsing back onto the couch, panting. When I looked down at him, he was grinning, blue, purple and pink frosting all over his lips.
“Okay, I’m going to need to make all new frosting. This is for a kid’s party and that’s just not right,” I breathed.
He burst into laughter, his chest heaving, but it quickly turned into a violent cough. I froze, pulling on my shirt and undies, and then I looked over at him. He was done coughing but he looked tired just from that little exertion. Reaching out, I trailed my finger over his scar.
“So, what are we dealing with?” I was scared to ask but I had to know. He’d kicked me out of the hospital before I could talk to the doctors about what happened. I know he’d had a heart attack, but that was all.
He was stoic and silent for a long minute before finally looking at me. “If these new anti-rejections meds don’t work…”
Oh God. No.
Colin’s heart could kill him? I lose the first man I love to a car accident and then the second man I love might be killed by my first.
Life couldn’t be that cruel, right?
“They’ll work.” I reached out and squeezed his hand, grasping at positivity like a life raft.
He nodded, giving me a weak smile. “So … it’s noon. That means if we catch the next flight out, we should still have time for the open mic night tomorrow.”
A grin swept across my face. “You didn’t cancel it?”
He shrugged. “I was going to and then I saw that a thousand people had RSVP’d. Thought it might be stupid to cancel that.”
I nodded. “It would.”
His brow furrowed. “Although everyone is commenting that they are only coming for the free beer.” He pinned me with a glare and I laughed. “Trust me, we’ll sell enough avocado toast to pay for the whole thing.”
He